In writing this editorial, I am reminded of something a dear friend, Steve Lockett once said. A man of impeccable taste whose ability to sense trouble is without peer, "Tale-tell Steve" is a purist in every sense of word. Not one to sugar coat words, when Steve talks, everybody listens. So it came as no surprise when he said that there are two types of women, ones a man is proud to be seen with and respects. And other is woman who doesn't feel worthy of respect, so men tend to discard her like day old bread. Not surprisingly, many view Steve's comments as those of a male chauvinist from a bygone era, but there is a tinge of truth in his verbal tirade.

Clearly, it's hard to respect someone who doesn't think much of themselves. Granted, this applies to either sex, but since we're talking about women we will limit our conversation to that gender. Okay back to article. To reiterate, if a woman feels that she is a hapless zero, t why should anyone respect her, when she doesn't respect herself? To paraphrase Steve, it just goes to show you that some women have it and some don't.

Lastly, as women let's remind ourselves that if you feel you are not getting respect you deserve, take a long hard look at yourself and ask yourself following questions? Are you acting, talking, dressing and behaving in a way that commands respect? Or does your entire demeanor cry out "DON'T CARE" "DON'T WANNA CARE" and "AIN'T NEVER GONNA CARE?" The choice is yours.

* Not her real name

A freelance writer since 1989, Peggy Butler has written for various magazines and Internet publications including Impact Press, Africana.com., TimBook Tu and The Black World Today.

Currently, she is a contributor for theblackmarket. com. Visit her website at: www.Psbwrite.com

Copyright 2005 by Peggy Butler

How do you embrace your womanhood? Take a scheduled break from everything and do something just for you-yes, I realize that it sounds impossible, but 10-15 minutes each day can make all difference in world. You need to do what makes you feel like yourself, whether its reading a trashy novel over coffee to plucking your eyebrows, giving yourself a facial, painting your nails, exercising, putting on that too red lipstick, deep conditioning your hair, painting or crafting, smelling flowers in your garden, taking a bubble bath, listening to your favorite song…the list can go on forever. . Your family will learn to expect and respect your “me time” if you communicate with them, for example, “For now on, Mom is not to be disturbed from 8-8:30am”. The point is, do what feels good to you, and you will not resent doing everything that rest of world is demanding of you.