Depending on your child’s answers keep probing with thoughtful questions of your own.

LISTEN Listen with respect. Avoid interrupting with your own advice. If you interrupt, your child may shut down and only tell you what you want to hear. Then you’ll be stuck where you started-not knowing what or how your child really thinks.

APPRECIATE Look for thoughts from your child that you can truly praise. Smile, agree, and let your child know what you liked about his or her thoughts. Hopefully, your child will have already changed some old thoughts about cheating, like “It’s okay to cheat if I don’t get caught.”

NO CRITICIZING Why not criticize and lecture? Because you need to reflect on what your child said. You need to consider new ways to influence your child’s thinking toward a stronger healthier character. You need to create a thoughtful plan of your own for your child’s further improvement.

If you follow this 4-Point PLAN you will be giving your child three priceless gifts that all human beings want:

To be heard To be understood To be appreciated

These gifts will bond your child with you and influence his or her character too.

This 4-POINT PLAN is a powerful tool for discussing problems in movies and on TV. You can also use it to discuss real life difficulties at school, in neighborhood, within your family, and, especially, in stories with dilemmas. The next time you have something important to discuss don’t lecture. Next time Probe, Listen, Appreciate, and No criticizing. Try it. You’ll like it. Why? Because this 4-POINT PLAN will get you results you want, an awesome kid with an awesome character.

Jean Tracy, MSS, former teacher and family counselor, now author and speaker, is an award winning Distinguished Toastmaster. Jean helps parents and teachers raise awesome kids with awesome characters. You will find her parent/child discussion book, Character Building on BackTalk Street, her parenting products, and FREE bonding activities, parenting tips, and articles at http://www.KidsDiscuss.com

Hair Care 101

The key is to be encouraging; as children start to take an interest in their own hair and how they style it, this is time to encourage them to follow an entire regime of good hair hygiene practices. It is important to show a child (when they are willing), how to properly shampoo and rinse their own hair. You can also teach them about towel blotting, detangling, combing and brushing their hair. Help them build a good hair hygiene schedule so that they learn importance of keeping their hair clean and neat. Try also to get them to develop good eating habits because healthy hair is very dependent on high quality carbohydrates and plenty of fresh fruit and vegetables. Good nutrition will promote shine and condition at any age.

Tips for Tip-Top Hair

Washing - use a mild shampoo, preferably in child's favorite color or scent. Sometimes children are more willing to wash their hair with a fun shampoo, especially if it doesn't sting their eyes.

Combing/brushing - try to create trust and reassurance by allowing them to comb and brush their own hair on their own terms. Do not brush your child's hair 100 strokes before bedtime in traditional manner - this will over stimulate sebaceous glands and make hair greasy and heavy. Doing a quick brush to get tangles out should be sufficient. Combing hair will promote shine and condition. Remember to use a comb on wet hair rather than a brush or you risk creating static electricity, which leads to breakage.

Accessories - give your child high quality combs and brushes and teach them proper way to care for their hair to instill good grooming habits that will last a lifetime. Purchase some "hair friendly" clips and hair ties to help a child keep their hair off their face, and reduce chance of tangling or matting. Stay away from any hairclips with sharp teeth, because they can cut into hair and cause potential hair damage.

Tangles - all parents know that dealing with tangles is a nightmare for both parent and child. Here's how to reduce trauma of removing tangles:

1. Hold section of hair you're trying to comb out.

2. Hold it taut so child won't feel you ripping through ends. 3. Spray a good leave-in detangler on knot.

4. You can also comb conditioner in while child's hair is still wet. Children need conditioner too (avoid heavy types and stick with conditioners that are specifically called "light" conditioners).

References:

1. Children's Hair, www.Styles101.com 2. Child Hair Style and Hair Care Tips, Short-hair-styles.com 3. Lets Talk Kids Hair, Lynne Chapman http://www.BellaOnline.com