“No one sits behind me at theatres or ballgames if I can help it.”

This happens to be a learned quirk, and for good reason. I’ll never understand why people pay lots of money to go to a ballgame, only to sit there and yap all way through it. Worse yet, how many of y’all have shelled out for a movie, gotten to pivotal point in film, and heard a cell phone go off? And even worse than that, how many times has person making noise been sitting directly right behind you? Because of dopes like these I’ve learned to never let anyone sit behind me if I can help it, and if I can’t, I try to eat a couple of bowls of raisin bran right before I attend event.

“I read while I eat.”

Can’t help it, Ed Jr. used to read paper at table when I was growing up, so I mooched this quirk off him. Y’all can’t make fun of it ‘cause I had no choice, and y’all don’t really want to make fun of my dad, now do you?

“I don’t like doing stuff I don’t like.”

I don’t understand why this is even categorized as a quirk, to me it makes perfect sense, but I’m told by my spousal unit that it’s a huge quirk. “Edward, you can’t always do things you’d like to do.” Maybe one day I can make myself enjoy funerals for relatives I don’t even know, prom lead-outs, and watching other people’s home movies, but don’t hold your breath...

All of y’all should be primed up pretty good right now. You guys out there, y’all just put down paper, smile, and look over at your ladies and say, “You know, honey, I’ve always want to talk with you about why you go to bathroom so often.” And ladies, y’all just put down paper, smile, and look over at your man and say, “Snugglekins, why is it that you smell a tad musty even after you bathe?” That should get ball off and rollin‘....

All ladies took great pride in their special dishes at church fellowship supper and would not be caught dead with a dish from store. So, my mother faced a special dilemma. On one hand, she couldn't lie and take credit for something she didn't do, but on other hand, she was backed into a serious corner.

I, being young at time, did not understand all that was going on, but I could tell my mother was in a lot of distress. Then, like sun rising in morning, her face lit up and a big smile crawled across her face.

"Ladies," she giggled with delight, "I could never give away family secret recipe."

As silly as this seemed to me then and now, all ladies of church nodded knowingly and that was end of it. Every woman knows every other woman, especially mothers, have secrets they cannot divulge. This goes double for secret recipes from kitchen. They understood certain confidences are not to be breached.

This spawned a new dilemma for my mother. She was now expected at every church fellowship supper to bring her famous meatloaf. Once, I remember, she tried to make a meatloaf but it didn't turn out like her "famous" meatloaf and she feared taking such a risk with such a discriminating group as ladies of church. For next 20 years, she was forced to purchase her famous meatloaf from market in high hopes that no lady from church would discover her secret recipe for her meatloaf.

Several times during that 20-year time my mother volunteered to bring some other dish but none of ladies would hear of it. One lady expressed obvious opinion of entire church when she said, "Our church fellowship suppers would not be same without your homemade meatloaf." Nothing more needed said.

My mother smiled, hiding fear lurking in her heart that one day her meatloaf recipe would be found out.

Fortunately, nobody ever found out my mother's recipe for her amazing meatloaf. Although she moved and no longer attends that church, she once in a while delights a family reunion with her famous meatloaf.

Mysteries are all around us every day. Even Bible is full of mysteries. Some mysteries we will never discover and only eternity will reveal them.

Some, however, God graciously reveals to us now. One for example is; "To whom God would make known what is riches of glory of this mystery among Gentiles; which is Christ in you, hope of glory:" (Colossians 1:27 KJV.)

Mystery of mysteries is that God delights to reside in people like you and me.

Reverend Snyder is currently ministering at the "Family of God Fellowship" in Ocala, Florida. More of his articles are available for reprint at his website: http://www.godspenman.com/ Rev. Snyder is available as a guest speaker. He writes a weekly column and is the author of "You Can Always Tell a Pastor; But Not Very Much " available at: http://www.jamessnyderministries.com/