Taking time to refresh your knowledge about pregnancy and birth – Especially if you are going to be part of child birthing process, a brief refresher of what to expect would be helpful. Your daughter will look to you at various points of process for your reassurance. It would be helpful if you are able to use terminology she learned during birthing preparation classes to let her know you are aware of what she is experiencing and can relate with up to date information.

Setting aside at least two to three weeks time – Being available to spend or be on call to help new mom during recuperation and adjustment period is an invaluable gift your daughter will never forget. Sleep schedules, adjusting to feeding, doctor’s appointments, stabilizing meal schedules, addressing unexpected emergencies, doctor’s visits, and helping with general lifestyle changes all make a difference between smooth and traumatic transition. The significance of your presence during this time cannot be measured.

Scheduling “readiness” packing--Do not wait until your daughter is heading to hospital to pack items as you may be asked to stay with mom and dad at hospital overnight. Be sure to include dried fruit, juice, peppermints, and other light refreshments you can use during break times. Our team took turns sleeping and eating during 17 hours my daughter was in labor. We prepared a food kit that included toothbrush, wash cloth, music for her comfort, and fresh fruit. Unfortunately, hospital machines offer carbonated soda and potato chips that are uninviting during early morning hours.

Another preplanning strategy you should consider is talking to new mom and dad about what they may need from you after birth of child. Often new parents don’t consider need for help until issue arises. By initiating this conversation, new parents have option to consider whether there is a need for help for one or two weeks to support a variety of issues including monitoring phone calls and visitors, helping with home chores, washing clothes, and preparing meals. These are a few of their favorite things.

Participating in birth of your first grandbaby will mark a moment in your life that can only be matched by your daughter’s birth. Your role is different this time, but it is pivotal to joy of your daughter’s birthing experience. Congratulations Grandma!!

Does sound of his laughter fill you with joy? Listen to actual sound of his laughter. Does sound make your heart go pitter patter? It doesn't matter if he sounds like thunder on a summer day or if he giggles like a little girl! What matters is that his laughter is infectious and makes your heart lighten. Imagine coming home from a really bad day at work. Upon entering house, you hear his laughter coming from kitchen. Does that sound lift your spirits? Or infuriate you even more? You want to be with someone who's laughter makes your heart sing. Laughter is best medicine and you want to chose a man who's laughter heals your weary mind.

Do you laugh at same things? Yes, you want to be your own person with your own interests and your own unique sense of self, but you also want to share good times with your partner. You need to pick someone who has a similar sense of humor to your own. There's nothing worse then having your partner roll their eyes like you're so uncool every time you burst out laughing. What determines a person's sense of humor is wide and varied, including upbringing and level of education. If you share same overall sense of humor, chances are that you are fairly compatible in those areas. You're somewhat on same wave length.

Do you laugh at same time? You want to pretty much agree on when is proper time and place for goofing around and making each other laugh. If he likes to crack jokes and laugh a lot during foreplay and you find it to be a total turn off, then you're going to have problems. If he keeps laughing at your girlfriends when you're trying to have a serious conversation, then you're not going to get along so well. This also works in other direction. If you're one who is constantly laughing and joking and he's one getting upset that your timing is inappropriate, then you're not going to like hanging out with a fuddy duddy. Compatibility shows itself in little things like timing.

If you've already got a guy and you're considering spending rest of your life with him, start watching his laughter. Decide if things you see are what you want in a lifetime companion. If you don't have a man, imagine sitting at kitchen table over coffee and hearing his laughter at something witty you've just said. How would it sound? How would it feel to be in his presence when he was laughing? Look for a man who's laughter heals you rather than grates on your nerves. And make sure you both laugh together and often. It'll get you both through tough times.

Copyright 2004, Skye Thomas, Tomorrow's Edge