We hear a lot in media about overextended children who are faced with pressures to be involved in sports and other pursuits, and to do homework, and to get good marks. I see from these products that this push to engage children in some sort of activity, to make them excel and stand out, begins at a startlingly young age. It is only natural for parents to want best for their children. There is nothing wrong with some educational media and toys. And, in my opinion, a child can never have enough books. But I have to wonder if we have lost sight of simplest method of developing language in children – face to face interaction . Isn’t it obvious? The best way to teach your child to communicate is to communicate with your child. You do not need a video, CD, or flashcard as an intermediary. Touch your child, talk to your child, let your child see your face and your mouth moving.

Next time you think about picking up a Baby Shakespeare or Bath Math video, think twice. Why not go home and read some nursery rhymes to your child or play a counting game with his fingers and toes? I guarantee a much more rewarding experience for you both.

As an alternative, keep a daily journal of blessings you experience.

Whichever way you count your blessings, you'll gain perspective and be better able to resist making comparisons when you see how others are blessed.

Tips 3, 4 and 5 can be used in moment when you begin to compare yourself with someone else.

TIP 3. EXHALE.

It's amazing how a timely exhale can create space for serenity and perspective.

Start by bringing your attention to your breathing, at your belly. Don't try to manipulate your breath. Just notice it, following in-breath and out-breath through several cycles. Then, on an out-breath, let thoughts of comparison leave your body.

Once you've blown comparison away, you might ask yourself, "Is this where I want to put my energy today?"

TIP 4. ACKNOWLEDGE LOSSES.

When you find yourself making a comparison, notice whether other person's success is reminding you of a hope or dream you have set aside. If so, be kind to yourself, and take time to recognized your loss.

TIP 5. SHIFT INTO GRATITUDE.

Try this tip now. Sit back comfortably. Think back to a time when you were feeling pull of comparison trap. Now, try shifting to a perspective of gratitude. Once you make shift, notice how you feel.

Gratitude is tremendous empowering. Shifting easily into gratitude may take a few tries, but it's a skill well worth cultivating.

YOU, YOUR FAMILY AND YOUR CAREER ARE UNIQUE. As you learn to focus more and more on your own life with calm, loving attention, you can leave comparison trap far behind.

(c) 2004 Norma Schmidt, Coach, LLC