6. Reexamine. Reexamine situation from vantage point of present. How did you grow as a result of pain? Was there a hidden gift in going through experience? What did you learn as a result of situation? Repeat until you can feel gratitude toward situation, pain, resentment, anger and other person.

7. Pray. If you pray, say following prayer for at least a month and perhaps longer until you feel complete: "Please remove resentment/anger/pain I am feeling toward/about [name]. Please give [name] as much joy, prosperity, love, etc., as I want for myself."

8. Perform a ritual. Do something physical to symbolize that you are now letting go of past and are ready to move freely into present. Repeat until you feel complete.

9. Repair damage. Actively repair damage that was caused to you. If something of yours was taken, replace it with an item just as good or better. If you were emotionally hurt, give yourself kind of support, acknowledgement, love, etc., that you wanted from other person. Ask trusted others to provide you with emotional support you needed and did not get. It's ok to request to be treated in exactly way you need in order to heal.

10. Talk to spirit of person. Sometimes our relationships go so wrong, so much hurt is created, that it is difficult to imagine person giving us understanding we need to get complete. In these cases, have conversations with person's spirit. Although they may not be able to hear you, you know their spirit will. Recreate suggestion in #4, but talk to person's spirit rather than to actual person.

When you let go of past hurts and resentments, an unimaginable field of possibilities will open up for you. You will be free from your past. You will be free to form bonds with people based on essence and beauty of who you are. You will be able to see essence and beauty of others. From that freedom you will be able to create your ideal relationship.

Your Relationship Coach, Rinatta Paries www.WhatItTakes.com

(c) Rinatta Paries, 1998-2002. Do you know how to attract your ideal mate? Do you know how to build a fulfilling relationship, or how to reinvent yours to meet your needs? Relationship Coach Rinatta Paries can teach you skills and techniques to attract and sustain long-term, healthy partnerships. Visit www.WhatItTakes.com where you'll find quizzes, classes, advice and a free weekly ezine. Become a "true love magnet(tm)!"

4. You let them know their call is important to you.

5. And you asked for a detailed message.

Asking for a detailed message is very important. It allows you to be prepared when you return their call by knowing what they were calling about. It also prevents a lot of time lost playing telephone tag. If caller leaves you enough detail, you may be able to take care of their request, and when you return their call, should you get their recorder, simply be able to leave a message that you accomplished task.

Here are a few rules to go by when answering phone and recording an answering machine message.

1. Your answering machine message should be in an adult voice. Having your children on your answering machine may be cute, but it is unprofessional.

2. Make sure room is quiet when you record your answering machine message. Noises from children, window air conditioners, televisions, radios, refrigerators and like are distracting to caller.

3. Never let your younger children answer phone. Older teenagers should be trained to answer phone in manner described in this article.

4. Unless you have equipment to professionally dub music, do not play music on your answering machine message. It sounds terrible, is distracting, and is unprofessional.

5. When you are available, answer every call. People want immediate response.

6. Answer all calls in manner described herein. Even if it is your closest friend or a member of your organization you speak to several times daily. This does two things. First, it keeps you in habit. Secondly, it sets an example for members of your organization.

By following these few simple rules, you will make best first impression possible.