My Baloney Has a First Name and Other Shallow Thoughts

Written by Joe Hickman

Continued from page 1

I made a killing inrepparttar market. The farmers market. I ran over a chicken.

Should you feel special if your dog can do a great impression of Yoko Ono?

What are your chances of success if you post a flyer inrepparttar 143237 barn seeking a ribeye donor?

Would anybody like to buy my used electricity for half price?

What if you got away from it all and there was no place to stay?

Mow that Madonna is middle-aged, do you suppose she still buys underwear that has to be polished

Joe Hickman is editor at --

Gay Zombie Hunter's Dilemma

Written by Karl Mueller

Continued from page 1

Current day, it has been fairly uneventful; easy jog pastrepparttar horde of slow-moving decayed masses. That is until I am now met withrepparttar 141687 hardest choice Iíve ever had to make. From out ofrepparttar 141688 crowds has come a familiar face. Who else could it be butrepparttar 141689 iconic American singer, film actress, director and producer extraordinaire? Yes, it is Barbara Streisand, and she is inrepparttar 141690 way. There are no 2 ways about it. If I want that crystal serving tray I am going to have to take my trusty pink chainsaw to her crooked zombie nose. Or should I accept defeat, and allow my role model to passrepparttar 141691 curse on to me? Could be an honor really, but it could berepparttar 141692 worst defeat of my life (andrepparttar 141693 end of it, for that matter).

What should I do? Please, I need your help because my logic is not sound atrepparttar 141694 moment. Visit me at , and hurry! I do not have much time.

Karl Mueller is an author and founder at

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