Men and Their Little Friends

Written by D. Gustafson

Continued from page 1

It almost appears thatrepparttar adult penis isrepparttar 118269 equivalent of a Barbie doll. They get to bathe it, dress it up, and play with it.

Not only is maintenance a problem, but judging from snippets of overhead male conversation, bad penile behavior certainly must run rampant. Truly, their conduct must be appalling. These poor, put upon, men are constantly involved inrepparttar 118270 distasteful, but necessary task of rebukingrepparttar 118271 wayward organ, by “spankingrepparttar 118272 monkey” or “chokingrepparttar 118273 chicken”.

And accountability? Nope, none at all. These tiny, dangerous organs take no responsibility for their actions. They’re able to rise from their little nest, and somehow, with only one good eye, are able to hypnotize their owners, allrepparttar 118274 while, ferreting out their target. What they do, and how they do it is of no concern. They’re not particularly picky about their targets either, often adopting an “any port inrepparttar 118275 storm” type of mentality. Sometimes they’ll even go off, half cocked, leaving their poor owners dazed and senseless.

We, as women, really should give men a bit more respect. Spending a lifetime as a penis wrangler deserves some sort of credit.

In case you’re wondering how I feel about my body parts - I have a vagina. I’m glad I have a vagina. It just sits there and patiently waits for its call to action.

And byrepparttar 118276 way, you’re not going to catch me calling anything “Large Marge”.

Copyright 2003. All rights reserved. For more really swell aspects of life, visit Mama's Secrets,

D. Gustafson is a mother, grandmother, daughter, ex-wife, artist, accountant, webmaster, and published writer.

Oh, and of course, we can’t leave out, “over achiever”. Give her a couple of years, and with any luck, maybe we can toss in crane operator and, who knows, possibly dictator of a small tropical island.

I nearly Drove the Ruddy Fire Engine Myself

Written by Holmes Charnley

Continued from page 1

Well, I fairly dragged my step-kids intorepparttar queue, I was so excited. They were a little shaken but once I explained why I'd dislocated their shoulders they too got all excited. Almost as excited as me. Regrettably at 33, I had to wait behind, but asrepparttar 118268 engine pulled away, their faces beaming, I felt something deep inside and I couldn't help but grin back. (I was tempted to hijackrepparttar 118269 ruddy thing and drive it myself, but there we are. It would have ended in tears.)

Times of change will inevitably be hard for us as humans but I have learnt to cherish these nuggets. Change gradually becomes no change at all but inrepparttar 118270 interim process, cherishing these nuggets, these moments, makesrepparttar 118271 transition far more digestible and fun.

Freelance Journalist: like this article? is my website where ... who knows, you might enjoy more.

    <Back to Page 1 © 2005
Terms of Use