TAKE ACTION

Writing your goals down is a good first step. Then you need to take action! The sooner you take action, better. Maybe it's enrolling in a class. Or signing up to attend first networking event. Even if action you take is small compared with all that needs to be done to achieve your goal, it will get you one step closer and psychologically make you feel more committed.

SET DEADLINES

If you simply resolve to make changes or achieve things but don't have any timeline set to your goals, you run risk of getting lazy and procrastinating. Set up a plan with deadlines to reach on a regular, perhaps monthly, basis. Then make sure to update your plan if a deadline is missed so that subsequent deadline doesn't become impossible to meet.

REWARD YOURSELF

Getting yourself to change behavior is hard - even if it's something you really want. When it comes to changing behaviors, it's helpful to think of yourself as a coach. A coach will push you hard when he knows you can do better. But if you work really hard and give 100%, he'll also reward you for a job well done. Any achievement plan should also include incentives and rewards. For example, if you hate public speaking but realize you have to improve your skills to get a better position, you might commit to treat yourself to ice cream whenever you deliver a speech for your public speaking class.

Transference doesn't happen only after you've been hired. People often attach excess meaning to interviews and to interviewers themselves. Some people equate interviews with emotions they felt when taking a test in school. Maybe getting a bad grade on a test would have resulted in a scolding from a parent. If you're nervous before going on an interview, stop for a minute and ask yourself what thoughts and concerns you have. If you write them down on paper, there's a good chance you'll see many of concerns are not rational.

Being aware of emotions you have and reasons for them can help you to be both a better employee and a better job candidate. Everyone likes a positive working environment. A work environment where people treat each other with respect and are warm and friendly with each other is great for everyone. But watch out for situations where you attach excess emotional meaning or expectations to a boss or to a group of people. If you subconsciously expect to receive love and unconditional acceptance from people who are not in a position to provide that, it can be detrimental to your career.

Not only can it be damaging in ways mentioned above at time it happens, but it can cause you to look for that same kind of emotional "fix" in future positions. Imagine if you interview with a company wondering if that company and/or that boss would love you as your parents did. Granted, no one thinks this on a conscious level, but even if it is happening subconsciously, it has potential to make you really nervous and be generally distracting.

Taking a serious assessment of your emotional ties to work, bosses and employers can be difficult. But understanding if and how they are influencing you can make you a more powerful individual!