The best way to deal with such a person is to simply let them run through their scripts and avoid falling prey to their imposed directions. They are not easy to spot as they tend to become your best friend and then, they slowly turn situation to their personal benefit. You never know what hit you because transition occurred at a slow pace and you begin to think it's your own fault for failure of situation.

--- What's next? ---

Crazymakers and Intimidators enjoy their task because it gives them satisfaction in knowing that they have taken control over a situation. They are interested in predetermined responses to their actions. This is important to them because, generally, they don't have control over anything else in their lives. Additionally, by making you look less than desirable allows them to feel as though they are better than you and those around them. In end, it is easier for them to live off of negative energies that they create. They cannot live in a world of positive energies and "equals" because they feel inferior to other human beings.

Crazymakers and Intimidators are smart in that they know how to manipulate people and situations in what they think of as a "test of survival." However, they don't know how to react when their ploys don't work. Your best bet is to notice these types of personalities and put them on back burner. Any type of response in their favor pushes ball further into their court.

Over years I have generalized some signs that come in handy for determining if either of these personalities is near. If someone comes to you and purposefully says something that goes completely "against your grain," then they are an Intimidator. If someone dramatizes a situation or somehow works to play one side against another simply to become savior, they're a Crazymaker. However, over time, if you observe others, you will be able to recognize these types of people and identify your own "tell-tale" indicators.

--- About Author ---

Edward B. Toupin is an author, life-strategy coach, counselor, Reiki Master, technical writer, and PhD Candidate living in Las Vegas, NV. Among other things, he authors books, articles, and screenplays on topics ranging from career success through life organization and fulfillment. Check out some of his recent print and electronic books as well as his articles covering various life-changing topics!

For more information, e-mail Edward at etoupin@toupin.com or visit his site at http://www.make-life-great.com or http://www.toupin.com!

--- How can I achieve recovery? ---

Recovery is your choice. You must first choose to acknowledge its existence and then you must choose to do something about it. Acknowledge that you are not a victim and take responsibility that you chose to enter into addiction. By doing so, you are taking control to be able to take responsibility for choosing to not be addicted any longer.

Abstinence is first step to recovery. Immediately stop what you're doing, whether it is through counseling, medical assistance, or simply ceasing your addictive actions. Of course, it is easier said than done.

One thing that we do in my coaching sessions is, once a client seeks assistance from qualified medical professionals, we immediately begin to replace addictive situation with something else that is of benefit. For instance, many of those clients who are addicted to some substance or situation are because they don't know what else to do or need to move in a direction away from a current situation. With nothing else in life, they drink, use drugs, or continually place themselves back into situations that are consistent and provide "comfort zones" that keep them in an arena that feels safe.

--- A replacement addiction? ---

While replacing one addiction with another does not sound appealing, indeed, it is a path that is essential to success of recovery. For instance, while I may not agree with support groups, many people find them useful and a necessary part of life. Indeed, while these are a replacement addiction for other addiction, they are not as harmful as addiction that they replace. At very least, such support groups are a reasonable replacement of addiction until person is strong enough to stand up against their previous addictions.

For many of my clients, they have found that by defining a plan for their life, instead of meandering to point of getting lost and addicted to something else that is harmful, they are better able to cope with their recovery. With help from their medical professional, along with a life plan, they can remain focused and busy while working toward their Vision. In process, their values change to point that they no longer require a substance to give them necessary feelings that they pursue.

One example was a young man whose father committed suicide. It threw him into a cycling depression where, at one moment he was fine and, over a period of months, he would be depressed again and have to work to recover from depression. In process, he turned to a serious alcohol addiction, which nearly disrupted his entire life. After focusing on core depression and working with his doctor to stabilize his emotions, we worked together to find a way to piece together a new life. Indeed, with loss of a family member, life does change, yet he was unable to cope with this change as he was caught in life he had prior to loss.

Realize that addiction can take on a mind of its own and will eventually do anything to ensure that it gets what it wants. It can begin to define you. However, it is essential to turn that hunger into something else with a different focus and desire. That is core success of recovery.

--- What's next? ---

Inside of every addicted individual is original person who was full of wonder and excitement about possibilities that lay ahead. Somewhere along way, this person became lost and fell prey to pleasures of their addiction. They instinctively decided that greatest pleasures that life comes from use of a substance and they reordered their life to accommodate this new desire at all costs --- this is destructive point of addiction. It is here that they must make a choice and engage in a fight for survival.

There are a number of pitfalls common to self-recovery from addiction. Those who want to help you, but were never addicted themselves, have little to share on subject, as their experience and beliefs are based on information provided by equally misinformed books and experts. Additionally, our society sees addiction as a noble affliction and denies that self-recovery is possible. As a result, society does not reward, and sometimes punishes, people who accept personal responsibility for their addictions and their recovery.

Realize that, if your environment has changed because of your addiction, all is not lost. If your family left or you lost your job or even if you lost some aspect of your life, final decision that you make to move on with your life is one that matters most above all. You still have yourself and, in long run, that is truly all that matters. Spend some time with your real self, as you might be surprised at hero you just found!

--- About Author ---

Edward B. Toupin is an author, life-strategy coach, counselor, Reiki Master, technical writer, and PhD Candidate living in Las Vegas, NV. Among other things, he authors books, articles, and screenplays on topics ranging from career success through life organization and fulfillment. Check out some of his recent print and electronic books as well as his articles covering various life-changing topics!

For more information, e-mail Edward at etoupin@toupin.com or visit his site at http://www.make-life-great.com or http://www.toupin.com!