He was very emotionally closed after an awful divorce and would not let me in, at first. Instead of harping on fact that he wouldn't talk (you know how a woman's gotta talk), I let him be and just showed him that I could be trusted beyond a shadow of a doubt. When he realized this, he opened up and now let's me know if there's an issue.

When he comes home from an awful day at office (you can just SEE it on their faces, can't you?), I kiss him hello and leave him alone until he is calmer and comes to talk to me. Similarly, if I am in a crying mood, he lets me rant and just listens for a while. When I'm done he kisses me and wipes my tears. We have both learnt that figuring out what is a highly charged emotional state in one of us, needs to be treated in a way that will soothe other person, in order to keep harmony.

He knows that if he doesn't let me rant, I will be in a BADDD mood for a year or two, and I know that if I nag when he needs to calm down, I'll get silent treatment for a year or two.

So it basically comes down to study of Human Behavior. You have choice of two consequences of your actions. Choose result you wish to have and then act in a way that will produce that result. Give all love you have to give and it will be returned manyfold.

We are as happy as we are because we work at it. Do a little something every day that will strengthen your relationship.

Based on this principle, may all your relationships go way you consciously direct them and love will continue to make world go round :-)

One of most profound secrets to enable you to stop fighting change and learning to relish it, is our 'Attitude'.

Instead of seeing a potential change as a threat, learn to welcome prospect of a challenge as a wonderful learning tool.

Stop! Analyze event and see wood for trees.

So often we get caught up in emotion and this blinds us from seeing what is actually going on. We get so wrapped up in 'drama' of situation that we make situation appear much more complicated than it actually is.

A wonderful set of techniques I use to get through stressful situations are:

-Take a deep breath, -Separate yourself from situation (look down on it as if you're flying), -Sift through emotions you're feeling and see if you are dramatizing them, -Get to root of why you're feeling that way and what is actually happening, -Seeing if you really have any reason to be feeling as apprehensive as you do, -Picture desirable outcome of getting through change, well, -Pray to God that He will give you strength to get through change, Brilliantly! -Change your attitude to one of faith in God, faith in yourself and your abilities, and a gratefulness for all that you will learn from this experience.

Follow these steps whenever you're faced with a stressful situation. See how clearing away 'emotional fog', helps you to resolve situation quickly and easily. It enables you to handle stress and even look forward to challenge of getting to other side.

Namaste Lisa van den Berg