The body is very wise. We need to honor this wisdom because sometimes pain can be a signal that we need to change something in our diet, environment, lifestyle or our relationships. In this way, pain can be a great motivator. If we listen closely to our pain and pay attention to our body and our states of mind, our discoveries may guide us to what we need to do to reduce our pain. I have found that some of my own muscle and joint pains, as well as depression and anxiety, have been triggered or made worse by food allergies, certain chemicals and by nutritional deficiencies. I eliminated wheat and refined white sugar and became free of anxiety attacks and severe depression that crippled me since my teenage years. By correcting a magnesium deficiency, I reduced chronic muscle pain by half. My pain has also taught me to become more outspoken and expressive, to get more sleep, to exercise according to my needs and to decrease stress. Pain has taught me to live more consciously within my limits.

Some pain should never be limited or eliminated too quickly, even if it may feel overwhelming. The loss of a relationship or death of a loved one as well as loss and grief one experiences living with chronic illness should be felt fully and mourned. The pain should run it’s natural course, otherwise it may cause difficulties later.

Then there is insidious kind of pain that seems to have no message or purpose. Or by time we realize what message or purpose is, there is already permanent damage done to body. It is often excruciating, disruptive and untreatable. For this category of pain, I found I must “go into it”. What does this mean? I allow myself to acknowledge and fully experience my frustration, resentment, grief and outrage over my suffering. I also allow myself to feel and experience physical pain in its entirety. I embrace it and become one with it. I surrender to it and I flow along with it and allow it to flow through me. I must come to accept it and learn to function within it. I must make pain my companion rather than my enemy. I have found that if I fully accept, rather than resist, pain in this way then it no longer has same power over my life. Initially in my illnesses I did a lot of cure chasing which eventually led me to realize that I was wasting a lot of time, energy and money. I found that I made more progress when I focused on learning how to live with my illness and within my limits.

Learning to live with pain is a difficult process. It is not a recipe that is same for everyone. It does, however, require a commitment to ourselves and a willingness to confront and challenge our social conditioning. We must give ourselves permission to feel without labels, judgments or time limits. We must let go of societies expectations and listen to our internal wisdom. It is important to support people in their efforts to listen to their internal wisdom and to validate their findings. At times it may be hard for us to hear messages carried in our pain or to appreciate them because pain is too great. There may be setbacks into old thinking patterns and we may not be able to accept, flow and find meaning for a while. We may feel angry at our fate. All of this is part of natural coping process, too, and it needs to be felt and respected. In no way does fact that pain carries valuable messages for us minimize frustration and suffering one endures, but I believe it is possible and necessary to honor both wisdom received and suffering.

Cynthia Perkins, M.Ed., writer, educator, therapist/advisor/coach and Holistic Health Consultant Specializing in Life Management and Support for Living with Chronic Illness, Chronic Pain, and Disability as well as Sexuality and Sexual Intimacy. FREE Newsletter and FREE 30 minute Consultation http://www.holistichelp.netl

7. Walking If you are capable of walking and if you enjoy it then walking briskly for at least 20 minutes (35 minutes is better) can also have pain-killing effects on body. If you don’t walk and it is something that is possible for you, then you might consider working on building this habit into your daily routine.

8. Sleep or meditate This technique is probably most useful with milder forms of pain, although with some practice it can become beneficial to more severe pain. Sometimes pain may be too great for this technique to work, because you may not be able to achieve a sleep or relaxed state, but even a semi-sleep or semi-meditative state can be useful too. Lie down, close your eyes and do deep breathing exercise to every part of your body beginning with your head and work down to your toes. Then either try to go to sleep or just meditate. When we sleep body repairs and heals itself. A short period of sleep can often give miraculous amounts of pain relief. If sleep is not possible then just continue deep breathing and think relaxing thoughts. Don’t allow yourself to think about what needs to be done, your problems, or anything else. Focus completely on your breathing. Repeating some form of mantra may be helpful to keep mind focused.

9. Nurture Your Soul Feeding your soul has a positive effect on your overall well-being. If your overall well-being is feeling better, then impact of pain will not be as powerful and disruptive. It will make you feel more at peace with yourself and world. Do daily activities that are food for your soul, such as getting in touch with nature, writing, reading, singing, a hot bath, special time with loved ones or whatever it is that is nourishing for you. The things that make you feel whole, alive and one with universe (or God) is your soul food.

10. Express Your Pain Verbally Most of us know that it is beneficial to express our emotional feelings and detrimental to our well being to let them build up. This can also apply to our physical pain. Physical pain and emotional pain are intertwined on a deep level. If we are enduring physical pain you can bet that there is some emotional pain brewing in back ground and vice-versa. Therefore, expressing your physical pain verbally can provide us with some relief. So let it out. Tell someone understanding and compassionate how awful it is and what it feels like. Vent, vent, vent. If you don’t want to verbalize out loud, then try writing it down on paper without censoring yourself.

Sometimes you may need to do all suggestions above to get relief or you may only need to do one or two. It varies from time to time. The degree of relief that I can achieve with these techniques varies from time to time, but majority of time I can get enough relief to function. At times I can do all of above suggestions and I can completely turn around my pain including a migraine. At other times, I will only cut my pain in half or almost eliminate it and then at other times relief may be minimal. It depends on factors such as what was trigger, how long did I wait before doing technique, what cycle of month am I in and how intense trigger was.