I remember one time when we had preacher over, and he got on a roll, talking for well over two hours. My mom sat there entire time in rapt attention, and my brother and I were completely miserable. I noticed that Ernest was getting sort of squirmy in his chair, and finally pressure got to him, and he reached down and scratched his butt right out in front of everybody. My mom was appalled, and immediately ordered him to leave room. As soon as he did, preacher went back to talking, and I can remember thinking that something just wasn’t right - I was being good, and as a result was being forced to listen to preacher, and my brother had just misbehaved, and he was as free as a bird. I then realized there was only one thing to do - I burped, really, really loud. My mom cried, “Edward,” and, with a horrified look, marched me out of room and told me that she would deal with me later. When preacher did leave, my mom told me that I had royally embarrassed her, and then proceeded to warm up my heiny like a bowl of grits. She did nothing to my brother, which led me to believe that butt scratching must be less sinful than burping.

So you see what I mean? Any room that you can’t sit down in, walk floor in, or even scratch yourself in is not a room - it‘s a prison, only decorated better. Maybe that’s something to consider - if prison overcrowding continues, maybe corrections officials would consider leasing out living rooms for cons to be housed in. If slick floors, National Geographics, and long-winded preachers don’t set ‘em straight, nothing will...

Remember $57 I talked about wasting earlier? That was difference in total cost between cheapest site I shopped and most expensive. A pretty hefty chunk of change, considering my basket had just four items:

1. A Britax Roundabout car seat in Denim (the price can differ depending on pattern)

2. The First Years On Go booster seat

3. An Avent newborn starter set

4. A Boppy

I used my address in Maryland to calculate shipping and tax. Obviously, cost to you will vary, depending on where you live.

And Winner Is...

Coming in at a lean, mean $255.55: Baby Catalog offered best deals. And this didn't include extra discount you get by signing up for their Baby Club of America.

Shopping.com came in a close second at $257.34, making it a worthwhile stop for anyone in market for baby gear. Plus, Shopping.com is integrated with Epinions.com, so you can get product reviews right there. I also liked fact that Shopping.com calculated total cost, including shipping and tax, in advance.

Baby Universe came in at $263.91. But keep in mind that Baby Universe offers a flat shipping rate of $6.95, no matter how many products you buy. So more you buy, better deal this site is.

Babies R Us was most expensive, at $312.97, followed by Target at $300.74, and BabyCenter at $285.06. Interestingly, both Babies R Us and Target are under Amazon.com umbrella, which means you should always comparison shop among different stores on Amazon site.

Keep in mind, too, that all of these retailers offer coupons and special deals from time to time. So it always pays to shop around.