Your only challenge is that people often won't tell you what their avoidance values are because they don't always know themselves. Only when you ask right questions will you be able to help them discover what these values are. Give them an example of what you mean by avoidance values and then ask them:

What must you absolutely not have when driving a car?

What do you not want in a car?

What do you want to avoid at all costs by using this product?

Which factors are most important to avoid?

Typical answers might include - poor visibility, limited leg room, a noisy engine. Let's say you were selling software, answers might be data loss, system crashes, limited upgrades.

Show your prospect how your product satisfies her values and protects her from her avoidance values and your powers of persuasion will be irresistible.

Give yourself time to get used to asking probing questions that elicit avoidance values. Although it seems unusual at first it does get easier with practice.

I believe biggest obstacle to successful selling, occurs in your own mind.

This is why some salespeople take it personally when a customer won't buy. They see refusal to buy as being a personal 'rejection'. Quite simply, in selling, if you constantly feel rejected you cannot achieve exceptional results.

It is also my belief that number one reason for mediocrity in selling, is that three letter word - EGO! A falsely inflated ego is a vulnerable, fragile thing.

If you are type of person who takes "No" as a personal affront to your very worth, selling will be an exquisitely painful process for you. The fact is most people, sensitive or not, will avoid pain at all costs. It's easy to become a master avoider and procrastinator.

If you cannot confront and take steps to resolve emotional issues that keep you prisoner and sabotage your success, then no amount of sales training will change your results for better. Many people have wonderful people skills and are natural persuaders, but as long as they continue to equate their self-worth with whether or not anybody wants to buy their products, they will set themselves up for a fall.

When someone does not accept an offer I make to them, I know it has nothing to do with me as a person. I therefore don't become emotional about it... and neither should you.