I'll be first to tell you, watching what Tom and Betsie do, and trying to act out this same thing between you and your mate, will only increase problems in your marriage relationship. Why? simply because you are trying to measure your marriage by someone else's standard. You have a totally different man/women in your life, create your own standards by learning what you both want in your marriage, then work by those standards. If you don't do this, get ready for a long, troublesome, frustrating journey.

In riding a bike, you need to learn balance to stay upright, and you need to pedal to move foward in direction you wish to go. When these two work together, result is a great breathtaking ride.

In marriage relationships, you also need forward, positive momentum, and balance. The wonderful things you do that pleases each other, builds passion and increases attraction (momentum), while learning more about each other and creating an environment for each of you to personally grow, gives balance.

Since there are also many things that decreases passion (slows momentum/love busters) and creates imbalance, both of you must constantly work at pedaling and balancing to build a great marriage (great ride).

Using those training wheels gave me an opportunity to learn how to balance and pedal at same time. After I'd gotten more comfortable coordinating two, my dad took training wheels off and helped me to move without them.

As married couples, because this is often new to us, creating balance and building

5. Take interest in what interests your spouse. Watch their favorite shows with them. Read their favorite book, so you can talk about it with them. Encourage them to develop their talents.

6. Listen to your spouse. Husbands, remember that women need to express their feelings. Be a good sport and just listen. Don’t interrupt, or get distracted. Empathize with her. Let her know that you can relate to what she’s feeling. Ladies, please remember that kind of talk you might like to have with your husband does not come naturally to most men. Just be patient. It’s not a good idea to "unload" on him right when he comes home from work.

7. Accept your spouse for who they are. Practice total acceptance. Don’t hold your spouse to your expectations; you will only succeed at building resentment.

8. Express your commitment. In little ways, you can, and should, renew your vows to each other over and over. Your spouse will feel comfortable and secure knowing that you are truly committed to marriage. True closeness will only happen when all doubt and insecurity is replaced by confidence in relationship. Let your spouse know that you really are in it "till death do us part."

9. Trust in each other. Don’t be suspicious. Don’t snoop through each other’s belongings. To help ensure trust, be honest with your spouse in all things. Never keep secrets from each other, not even little ones.

10. Make it your aim to be your spouse’s best friend. Appreciate your spouse for who they are. Loosen up and have fun with each other. If you are practicing steps above, you are on your way to being your spouse’s best friend ultimate relationship in marriage.