Follow leader. Face it, kids watch, and often imitate, everything we do. If they observe us eating a variety of healthful foods and exercising regularly, then they will learn to take good care of their bodies. Likewise, if they don’t hear us making comments like “I am so fat” and “she looks fat” then they are less likely to suffer from poor self-esteem and a judgmental attitude.

There is more to a party than cake and ice cream! Invite a child to a party and they’ll want to know what they are going to get to do. Invite an adult and they’ll wonder what food will be served. You don’t have to avoid parties to keep your weight down; just focus on real purpose of social events—to be social!

Eating with your family is fun. Since babies and toddlers must be fed by their parents, they naturally love eating with other people. Family mealtime is your opportunity to model good habits and connect with each other. Now that our kids are older, we sometimes play “High-Low” at dinner. Each member of family takes a turn telling others about best and worst parts of their day. What a door opener!

It’s boring to just sit around! Toddlers seem to be in perpetual motion as they explore their world. Young kids love to run in grass, play on playground, and challenge themselves and each other to increasingly more difficult activities. Of course, as they get older, television, computers, and electronic games compete for their attention. In our family, to encourage other activities, we use “screen time” which limits how much time our children are allowed to spend on anything with a screen. Sometimes adults would benefit by limiting their screen time and exploring their world a little more!

Sleep is good. After a full day, children need a good night’s sleep to prepare for all of adventures that tomorrow will hold. Wouldn’t we all benefit from a consistent bedtime to make sure we get our rest too?

Live in moment. Kids are masters at living in present. They don’t waste a lot of energy worrying about what has already happened or what might happen tomorrow. They are fully engaged in small pursuits like discovering where ants are going, chasing dog, or seeing how deep they can dig with a plastic shovel. We, on other hand, continue to scurry around, chasing after our dreams, and all while, digging ourselves deeper and deeper. We could learn a lot from children!

You might believe that a person who eats instinctively has been blessed with willpower and a great metabolism. But truth is, we were all born Instinctive Eaters. Its just that many of us “unlearned” our natural ability to know how much to eat. The good news is that you can relearn those skills if you are willing. I did! Here are some important steps to get you started.

1.Let go of idea that there is a perfect diet that will finally solve your problems. The answer lies within you.

2.Whenever you have an urge to eat, instead of focusing on food, first ask yourself, “Am I hungry?” Remember that hunger is a physical feeling. It is not same thing as appetite, cravings, or desire to eat.

3.If you are hungry, remember that there are no “good” or “bad” foods. You are less likely to overeat certain foods if you know that you can have them again when you really want them.

4.Stop eating when hunger is gone but before you feel full, even if there is food left. Give up your membership to Clean Plate Club!

5.If you are not hungry, ask yourself if something in your environment triggered your urge to eat and what you could do to reduce trigger or distract yourself from it. For instance, could you put candy dish out of sight or do something else for a while until you are actually hungry?

6.If there was an emotional trigger, ask yourself what you could do to better cope with that emotion. For instance, if stress triggered your urge to eat, could you try a relaxation exercise instead? 7.Don’t expect yourself to be perfect—it is not possible or even necessary.

By relearning to eat instinctively, you will see that eating to satisfy hunger is pleasurable and that it is good to eat foods that you enjoy. You will find that meeting your other needs in appropriate ways will bring balance and joy to your life. By learning these important skills, you will reach a healthier weight and a healthier lifestyle—without dieting!

Michelle May, M.D. is a practicing Board Certified Family Physician with expertise in the cognitive-behavioral aspects of weight management. She is the author of Am I Hungry? What To Do When Diets Don’t Work in collaboration with a Registered Dietitian and Psychologist. Visit her website www.AmIHungry.com for free health information, or sign up for fun and interactive workshops to help you achieve your health and weight loss goals.