Next time you feel victimized by circumstances, here’s a quick way to help you put problem in perspective:

Ask yourself 2 questions:

1. Does this problem change course of my life?

2. Will I still have this problem a month from now?

If you answered No to both these questions, just get busy and look for solutions. What can you do today to get back on track? When your inner brat complains, find a way to prove it wrong. To your inner brat, this situation looks like a crisis, but actually, it’s only an inconvenience.

If you answered Yes to #1 but not #2, it means you have grown from experience. Your inner brat may protest, but you will have upper hand.

If you answered Yes to #2 but not #1, you have some work to do in terms of minimizing inner brat's hold on you. Treat it as you would a nagging young child. It will quiet down if you ignore it.

If you answered Yes to both #1 and #2, I truly wish you strength to cope. Especially at times like this, you don't need your inner brat's negative energy to drain you. You do have resiliency in you - otherwise you wouldn't have made it this far. Every day ordinary people find ways to cope with extraordinary circumstances. Pay attention to that, not to your inner brat.

When "life" happens to you, take control of your inner brat. And let's hope you don't need one of those t-shirts as a reminder. ;-)

Copyright Pauline Wallin, Ph.D. 2005. All rights reserved

Pauline Wallin, Ph.D. is a psychologist in Camp Hill, PA, and author of "Taming Your Inner Brat: A Guide for Transforming Self-defeating Behavior" (Wildcat Canyon Press, 2004)