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What assumptions are you making?
What are you taking personally and carrying around as hurt feelings?
Are there times in your relationship where you’d rather be right than risk finding out something about yourself - something you’d rather not admit?
Can you imagine intimacy that becomes possible when you realize you have nothing to loose?
Here are five powerful tips for improving communication and intimacy in relationships. The first two are based on Don Miguel Ruiz book The Four Agreements:
1. Don’t make assumptions. Ask questions instead. Experiment with expressing what you really want. Communicate clearly to avoid misunderstanding.
2. Don’t take things personally. What others say or do is about them not you. We tend to project our own reality onto others. When we stop taking things personally we end our suffering.
3. Be willing to have nothing to loose. If we embrace love and truth - instead of fear - all we can really loose is our limiting beliefs that keep us stuck and separate from our ourselves and others.
4. Open to mindfulness in ordinary moments of your life. Enlightenment isn’t a destination. It can be as simple as how aware you are willing to be in middle of an argument…even about bananas.
5. Remember, when you become aware you are feeling hurt or bad…you always have a choice. To be right or to be free.
Want to know how story ended?
I released need to be right. I chose freedom. I chose to see my husband as my partner in growth. We had a wonderful, open conversation about what truly matters to us. We left kitchen together laughing and loving each other more than ever.
For us, bananas will never just be bananas.
It’s your life…imagine possibilities!
**************************************** Helaine Iris is a Certified Life Coach. She works with people who want more out of life. People who want to make personal, relationship or career changes, and lead successful, balanced lives filled with love, passion and purpose. Visit her at Path of Purpose Personal Coaching http://www.pathofpurpose.com or call her 603-357-8546 or email her email@example.com