Indifference and Decompensation in Pathological Narcissism

Written by Sam Vaknin

Continued from page 1

The narcissist's guarded detachment is a sad reaction to his unfortunate formative years. Pathological narcissism is thought to berepparttar result of a prolonged period of severe abuse by primary caregivers, peers, or authority figures. In this sense, pathological narcissism is, therefore, a reaction to trauma. Narcissism is a form of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder that got ossified and fixated and mutated into a personality disorder.

All narcissists are traumatized and all of them suffer from a variety of post-traumatic symptoms: abandonment anxiety, reckless behaviors, anxiety and mood disorders, somatoform disorders, and so on. Butrepparttar 143762 presenting signs of narcissism rarely indicate post-trauma. This is because pathological narcissism is an efficient coping (defense) mechanism. The narcissist presents torepparttar 143763 world a facade of invincibility, equanimity, superiority, skilfulness, cool-headedness, invulnerability, and, in short: indifference.

This front is penetrated only in times of great crises that threatenrepparttar 143764 narcissist's ability to obtain narcissistic supply. The narcissist then "falls apart" in a process of disintegration known as decompensation. The dynamic forces which render him paralyzed and fake - his vulnerabilities, weaknesses, and fears - are starkly exposed as his defenses crumble and become dysfunctional. The narcissist's extreme dependence on his social milieu forrepparttar 143765 regulation of his sense of self-worth are painfully and pitifully evident as he is reduced to begging and cajoling.

At such times,repparttar 143766 narcissist acts out self-destructively and anti-socially. His mask of superior equanimity is pierced by displays of impotent rage, self-loathing, self-pity, and crass attempts at manipulation of his friends, family, and colleagues. His ostensible benevolence and caring evaporate. He feels caged and threatened and he reacts as any animal would do - by striking back at his perceived tormentors, at his hitherto "nearest" and "dearest".

Sam Vaknin ( ) is the author of Malignant Self Love - Narcissism Revisited and After the Rain - How the West Lost the East. He served as a columnist for Central Europe Review, PopMatters, and eBookWeb , and Bellaonline, and as a United Press International (UPI) Senior Business Correspondent. He is the the editor of mental health and Central East Europe categories in The Open Directory and Suite101.

Collected Unpaid Child Support

Written by Detra Davis

Continued from page 1

3. Never write a check to a child support agency orrepparttar disbursement agency,repparttar 143719 money will not get torepparttar 143720 intended party.

4. Ifrepparttar 143721 custodial parent says “I’m not getting my child support payments”, and you know you are paying support, they may be right. Check it out. Once or twice a yearrepparttar 143722 names of those who may be owed undistributed funds are recorded in local legal newspapers, or posted onrepparttar 143723 state web site under unclaimed property. 5. Custodial and Non-custodial parents must notifyrepparttar 143724 child support agency and disbursement agency when there is a change of address. If you don’t inform them your support may be held byrepparttar 143725 state and not disbursed.

Over $100 Billion in accumulated unpaid support should raise a few eyebrows. It means there are child support payments out there that are not getting torepparttar 143726 children who need itrepparttar 143727 most andrepparttar 143728 government is not doing enough to address this issue. The next time someone suggest that a dad or mom stopped paying child support, investigate. Just because you did not get your child support money does not mean it was not collected.

Detra D. Davis is a writer with over 20 years of experience. Author of A Matter of Record: Keeping Track of Your Child Support, this tool is for both custodial and non-custodial parents. Email Detra at:, or by mail: J. Davis & Associates, P. O. Box 4935, Cary, NC 27513-4935, to learn more visit:

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