“Fine. Give her three chances. If she says no more than three times you don’t want her anyway. You really don’t need to get involved with someone who’s so insecure that they need you to jump off a cliff for them.”

“But what if she would have said yes on fourth call?”

“Then she’ll call you. Haven’t you noticed that when you pursue someone and then you suddenly stop, they miss attention and come after you? Of course, that’s only if they were interested in first place.”

John’s face fell. “That’s never happened to me.”

“Doesn’t surprise me,” I laughed. “You don’t give up until you’ve badgered them to death and by then they can’t stand you. Any attraction that might have existed is long gone.”

John was stunned. It was time to repair damage.

“Look, I’m telling you this to help. Make it a rule to give a girl three chances, then stick to that rule. You’ll save yourself a lot of time and heartache. And for God’s sake, pick them for a better reason than fact that they’re ‘cute’.”

John squared his shoulders. “Right! She gets one more chance. I’m calling her now.”

I groaned as he strode from room.

I doubted that he’d stick to three strikes rule. The movies offer many romantic storylines where couple start off hating each other and then fall madly in love. Many people like John are confused about when no means yes or no means no.

But it’s still safest to take a no at face value. Life’s too short to try second-guessing other people. And it’s much less stressful when people in your life are honest and open and aren’t afraid to tell you that they care. Why settle for anything less?

When you receive exceptional service at a restaurant or a member of public goes out of their way to help you out – what do you do? How do you thank them?

Recently a down and out guy sat hunched up in cold outside a chip shop was handed some chicken and chips and a hot cup of coffee by a concerned passer by who only went into chippie out of compassion to buy a meal for someone who was obviously less fortunate than himself. In response tramp replied angrily “You could have just given me some money”

You drive through a busy town centre and no one gives you right of way or offers to let you out so you have to edge your way into traffic and force yourself out into busy road, eventually blocking it so that others are reluctantly forced to let you out. Just when you despair of human race a natural disaster of epic proportion in form of a tsunami devastates a multitude of countries. Your faith in human nature is restored as you see millions, billions even, being donated to charities. The point of this rant? Did you donate to tsunami relief effort? Do you take trouble to thank people on a regular basis for things they have done for you or do you take it for granted. Are you a contributor to modern society and its ugly side? Think about it. It affects way you live…

Only you can really answer these questions. What experiences of ingratitude or gratitude have you come across recently?

A simple thank you costs nothing……..

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