IF YOU COMPARE, BEWARE

Written by Pauline Wallin, Ph.D.


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Research has shown that people who make a habit of such comparisons are generally less happy than are those who base their success on their own internal standards.

Hereís why:

When you compare yourself to people who have more than you, your inner brat gets into gear. Just like little Johnny andrepparttar chocolate cake described above, your inner brat dwells on what's missing, which makes you feel victimized. You'll never be satisfied, no matter how much you have, as long as someone else has more.

This isrepparttar 126072 same mentality that fuelsrepparttar 126073 huge salary demands by top athletes, actors and CEOs: "I'm making $20 million, but that's not enough becauserepparttar 126074 other guy's getting $30 million."

If comparing yourself to people who have more than you makes you feel worse, should you instead concentrate on comparing yourself to those who have less or accomplished less? Actually, no. While it might be comforting forrepparttar 126075 moment, it could backfire inrepparttar 126076 long run.

You could end up feeling even less secure, worrying that youíll lose what you have. Or you might feel guilty for having more than others, such that you subconsciously sabotage your future success.

Itís best not to compare yourself to anyone. Other peopleís achievements donít diminish your own, and their misfortunes do not improve your lot.

This doesnít mean that you shouldn't compete, nor that you shouldn't strive to improve. However, do it forrepparttar 126077 right reasons -- not because your inner brat is whining, but rather to develop and grow. That way, youíll enjoy your accomplishments so much more.

Pauline Wallin, Ph.D. is a psychologist in Camp Hill, PA, and author of "Taming Your Inner Brat: A Guide for Transforming Self-defeating Behavior" (Wildcat Canyon Press, 2004) She is also a life coach.

Visit http://www.innerbrat.com for more information, and subscribe to her free, monthly Inner Brat Newsletter.


Handbags as a Symbol of Female Power

Written by Henrietta Timmons


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Negotiations are underway forrepparttar famous handbag to be placed in a museum that houses Winston Churchill's papers and historical documents fromrepparttar 126071 War. There is no indication that Mr. Churchill's wallet is stored in this prestigious collection but, then again, Margaret Thatcher wasrepparttar 126072 first woman to impose her powerful presense (and pocketbook!) on 10 Downing Street!



I run an online handbag resource site located at: http://henriettashandbags.com


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