4. If your pet always runs away from you every time you pull camera out try leaving camera sit out where it can be seen. Take photos of other things in home and try turning flash off.

5. Be prepared to grab your camera and take photos when your pet is ready, read “doing something cute.” I’ve been able to get some of best photos of my cat when he’s just doing something on his own.

Remember don’t put pressure on your animal to perform for camera. Think more on lines of catch them in their natural habitat. Our pets want to make us happy and you can easily confuse them by pressuring them to look good for camera. Also be prepared to take a whole lot of bad photos for that one really good one.

Copyright 2004 Kelly Paal

Then there was Simon. I’ve got Pocket Simon. Rubbish. Simply a jumped-up memory game. Christ, you only have to look at picture of kids on box to know type who went in for this anathema of amnesia. Just staring at four colours was confusing enough. That was without trying to remember order in which they flashed before depressing buttons in correct sequence. One kid I remember was unbeatable at this. But then he wore specs and didn’t find smell of UHU fascinating. Unfair advantage really.

Juxtaposed with Simon travesty was game I always wanted. Galaxy Invader 1000. Though shade of yellow is what I can only describe as Renault Clio yellow, don’t let that put you off. Distributed by CGL (Computer Games Limited) shape was, in retrospect, merely a forerunner of penis extension. The E-type Jaguar of playground world.

These were games I remember most fondly from school. I’ve got a couple of others. I have Safari (Bambino). This comes in a yucky™ green but I don’t remember it at all. But this might have something to do with fact that you spend around 10 minutes boxing animals in before it dawns on you that you ought not to bother quite frankly. Obviously some kids must have owned it but never bought it in to school for fear of ritual humiliation.

And I now have Firefox F-7 (Grandstand, licensed to Tandy/Radio Shack). I don’t remember this one either but I don’t know why. Someone must have had this one and it makes Astro Wars look like Safari. Or Simon. (Now there’s a put down.) It’s kind of like Star Wars. Only you’re not at cinema and things … Buy it, still in its box and you’re talking around £85.

And writing this, it is now 25th anniversary of Space Invaders appearing in video game format. Hand-helds were now just new Pocketeers™. The local chippy would never be same again.

© Copyright Holmes Charnley mmiv