This shows us why Paul wrote in Acts 26:22, 23 that in all he did from beginning of his ministry until that time, he has said no other thing than those things which Moses and prophets said. This was all will of God not Apostles choice or his own ministry. Now what did Moses and prophets say? That Christ should suffer, be firstborn from dead and show light to Israel and Gentiles. This is not mystery which had been hid in God from ages and generations. Paul could quote chapter and verse from Jewish Bible to prove what he said.

From beginning of Acts twelve Apostles continued what Lord both began to do and to say. Paul simply continued that same ministry; for it was what he saw (Acts 26:16). Throughout Acts Paul preached what he had seen and heard twelve Apostles preaching. That was his theme also.

The Apostle Paul needed a vision concerning scope of that ministry. Peter had same experience. Peter was told to go preach to house of Cornelius. Peter did not change his gospel he just preached it to somebody else, Gentiles. So it was with Paul. He preached his gospel of King and kingdom to Jews first, and then to Gentiles. Paul did not require Gentiles to be circumcised and keep law. They were blessed with Israel thru Abraham by grace without addition of law. This was Paul's gospel of grace of God. But that ended in Acts 28:28.

Acts 28:28 declares salvation of God was sent to Gentiles, and this salvation was not blessings of kingdom, but rather Church with Christ as Head.

These were fears that I felt. The fear of unknown. The fear of things beyond my control. The fear of venturing out of my comfort zone.

Well, to make a long story short, I did get some answers from various insights that came into my mind as retreat progresses. At end of retreat, I had already made up my mind - I was going to give it a try. I was going to trust in Lord to pull me through.

In my first attempt at facilitating, it was not easy. It was like double amount of preparation I had to do as a participant. I had to make sure meeting room, writing materials, meeting schedule, TV, video tapes, player, songs, refreshments and many other details were in place before meetings. Then I have to know lessons well. If not, I will have difficulty answering some of questions from participants. Then extra traveling time and expenses. Unfamiliar faces, unfamiliar presentation materials, keeping to time allocated, coping with new demands from participants as well as from core team members...

To make matters worse, there were also some people who made it a point to bring people down by discouraging them with remarks like, "It's too demanding for us. How can you ever hope to succeed?"

Yes, it was extremely difficult in first year. It was like process of refining silver. It was a tough test.

But after a while, I managed to pull through.

Today, I had already done four years of facilitating and I am looking forward to my fifth year. I share feelings of Saint Paul when he said, "... forget what is behind me and do my best to reach what is ahead." (Philippians 3:13)

There were difficult and trying times, but in all of them, outcome turned up to be good. I had learned a lot, deepened my knowledge and I had gained a sense of peace by letting go of control of situations and letting God take over.

Incredibly, not once was I too sick to carry on. Not once was I not able to fulfill my obligation to my class participants. God had blessed me.

God was in control all time!