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Q: How else can I get new business?
A: Spam. Spam. Spam.
Q: I thought spam was bad.
A: No, spam is good. Anyone who says it's bad is just jealous because their brains are too small.
Q: But won't I lose my web host and ISP?
A: In get-rich-quick business, it's important to cultivate a zen-like non-attachment to service providers.
Q: What else can I do to promote my new business?
A: Here's a list of suggestions:
--Sign up with a free website provider and fill your site with zany colors and flashy banners.
--Join every free banner exchange.
--Get your own free-for-all links page.
--Join every opt-in email list with word Money, Rich or Lackwit in title.
--Buy software that submits your site URL to 15,000 most important search engines.
--Buy software that submits your ad to 50,000 most-read free classified sites.
--Buy software that submits your link to 100,000 most popular free-for-all link pages.
--Hire a bulk emailer.
--Sponsor a golf tournament.
Q: Okay, I've done all that and I'm still not rich. I haven't even driven my hitcounter to its knees yet. What am I doing wrong?
A: It's possible that you're not very bright. Consult one of your friends who has retired on their internet earnings.
Q: What if I don't have any friends who have retired on their internet earnings?
A: Then contact someone on internet who has retired on their internet earnings.
Q: What if I've never heard of anyone retiring from their internet earnings?
A: Well, then maybe you can be first.
Q: You're pulling my leg, right?
A: Oops! Sorry, I thought FAQ stood for Facetiously Answered Questions!
Linda Cox (J.A.M.G.) was born in a speeding stagecoach amid the screams of fellow passengers as insane, wild-eyed horses dragged them all crashing toward the brink of destruction. That stagecoach was the planet Earth, those passengers were the human race, and Linda Cox is Just Another Marketing Guru. (The horses were just regular horses.) http://www.LindaCox.com/