How my stutter started

Written by Stephen Hill

Continued from page 1

“You didn’t tell me Stephen had a stutter,” said Jean. “He hasn’t” said my mother in a shocked voice. This of course had beenrepparttar first time I had stuttered.

“Well he’s been stuttering quite badly here today,” said Jean, a slight over-reaction as I had only stuttered aroundrepparttar 145784 dining table, not inrepparttar 145785 garden etc.

My mother was obviously concerned and shocked but so was I. I had heard this conversation and although did not know what a stutter was, I was aware they were talking about my speech, not about how good it was but about how bad it was. This obviously made me feel paranoid and self-conscious.

Eventually my mother turned up to take me home but before leaving had a discussion with Jean in front of me about what had happened inrepparttar 145786 dining room. This of course made me even more aware of my failings. When we arrived home my parents sat me down and started to ask me questions about my day, this was not a normal event; they were listening to my speech. I was now feeling comfortable and did not stutter, I imagine this would have left them feeling confused. Forrepparttar 145787 rest of that evening I spoke fluently and eventually went to bed.

When in bed I always think aboutrepparttar 145788 day I have just had and also think about what might happen tomorrow. I thought that was a strange day, I was looking forward to going to Jean’s house and was originally enjoying myself playing football inrepparttar 145789 garden but then inrepparttar 145790 dining room I struggled to speak. I tried to analyze why that might have been and came up withrepparttar 145791 following three conclusions:

1.I may have struggled, as I did not feel comfortable.

2.I may have struggled because I felt under pressure.

3.I may have struggled, as I was having to speak and socialise with people I did not know.

All ofrepparttar 145792 above were new situations for me, as a four year old boy everything was made very easy for me, I rarely came into contact with new people, rarely felt under pressure or uncomfortable and if I did normally had my parents close at hand to help and comfort me.

I then thought about what might happen onrepparttar 145793 next day, I have to go to school, no problem, then I have to go to Jean’s house, oh no I thought, and then started to imagine myself inrepparttar 145794 dining room and could see myself stuttering when talking. What I am doing is pre-predicting failure which normally means failure. This is a common trait of many stutterer’s. I then started to worry and found it hard to sleep.

At schoolrepparttar 145795 next day I was totally fluent but as predicted stuttered quite badly inrepparttar 145796 dining room. Jean didn’t phone my mother this time but before leaving to go home they again discussed my speech in front of me. What I was hoping for but did not ask for was that somebody else could look after me but unfortunately I had to be looked after by Jean for around a year. My speech confidence became shattered andrepparttar 145797 stutter started to rear its ugly head in other areas, i.e. at school, and home etc.

Stephen Hill is somebody who has overcome a stammer/stutter and who now helps other people to achieve fluency. Stephen runs one to one speech courses held in Birmingham, England. For people who are unable to attend there is a seventy minute dvd available.

How having a stutter affected my life

Written by Stephen Hill

Continued from page 1

3.There will be more pressure atrepparttar new school,repparttar 145783 work will be harder, you hear allrepparttar 145784 stories of people having their heads flushed downrepparttar 145785 toilet or their money stolen fromrepparttar 145786 older pupils.

These thoughts made me extremely worried and nervous aboutrepparttar 145787 future.

The first day of senior school turned out to be a nightmare. After being split into three classes we were shown to our form rooms. Then a confident and smiling man (our Form Teacher) enteredrepparttar 145788 room and proceeded to welcome us into our new school. He then introduced himself and then to my horror said “as most of you do not know each other, I would like you each in turn to stand up and say your name and tell us which junior school you were at previously”. This was not a good start and predictably when it was my turn to speak, I stuttered. People knew straight away about my speech impediment, some laughed and I now had to face this on my own as my best friend fromrepparttar 145789 previous school was no longer around to help.

I had to grow up quickly but soon became quite depressed and my five years in senior school were by farrepparttar 145790 worst years in my life with stupid comments from certain adults not helping such as “these arerepparttar 145791 best days of your life so enjoy them”. This statement was apparently supposed to make me feel better!

Various days stick in my mind from school but by farrepparttar 145792 worst day was when I was around fourteen years of age. I was in a science class and we had just had a test. The teacher said “to mark this test, I want each of you in turn to stand up, read outrepparttar 145793 question, and then tell usrepparttar 145794 answer”. They started onrepparttar 145795 front row of which there were four people,repparttar 145796 second row had three, and I wasrepparttar 145797 third person onrepparttar 145798 third row, therefore I would have to read out question ten. I scanned down torepparttar 145799 question and to my dismay there was a “b” word inrepparttar 145800 question. Typically I stuttered when attempting to readrepparttar 145801 question and various people inrepparttar 145802 class began to laugh. I put my head in my hands to avoid seeing their joyful faces and then started to think, why have I got this problem when everyone is fluent? Why does everyone laugh? Will I always have this stutter? The laughter seemed to last for ages and eventually I looked up atrepparttar 145803 teacher, hoping he would help by controllingrepparttar 145804 class but to my disgust he was laughing himself.

I decided that after taking my GCSE’s thatrepparttar 145805 best thing I could do was to leave school and to try and find employment. I left school at sixteen after passing seven GCSE’s grade C and above. People were shocked at my decision, especially my family and asked me why I was leaving; I didn’t feel able to tell themrepparttar 145806 truth and stated that I wanted to earn some money etc.

Trying to find employment became yet another struggle, what work could I do with a stutter? I thought I could work as a simple filing clerk in an office and started to write to different companies. I then hadrepparttar 145807 pressure ofrepparttar 145808 interviews which I could virtually guarantee I would stutter at. I was accepted after six months of trying by an insurance company,repparttar 145809 company had a grading system and I was to be onrepparttar 145810 lowest grade. The role was simple and mainly involved filing papers. I decided to takerepparttar 145811 insurance exams and became qualified to be a Financial Advisor atrepparttar 145812 age of 22. The success inrepparttar 145813 exams helped my career and after a slow start quickly progressed uprepparttar 145814 grades to become a Team Leader (Grade 6), again atrepparttar 145815 age of 22. Having a stutter had not hindered my progress but had made life difficult at work.

My first promotion led to me having to answer and make telephone calls. The telephone for me was my worst area of speech and I found it especially difficult inrepparttar 145816 workplace.

The Team Leader position would put a lot of pressure on my speech as I had to interview people, attend meetings, make pressure phone calls, and appraise and lead a team of ten people. I felt I had reachedrepparttar 145817 stage where I had to overcomerepparttar 145818 stutter.

Stephen Hill is somebody who has overcome a stammer/stutter and who now helps other people to achieve fluency. Stephen runs one to one speech courses held in Birmingham, England. For people who are unable to attend there is a seventy minute dvd available.

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