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This version is only 28 words. Which of above do you prefer? Actually this is another trick question in two ways.
First, it's wrong question. You should be asking what your readers prefer. The better question is which of three versions best makes point clear to your readers? And which will they find easiest to read?
Second, what you prefer does not matter. That's just personal reading taste. What does matter is which of above better fits way you want to write.
I might use original form to introduce a topic. Then follow up with a paragraph or two about each of key points included or implied in sentence. However, Revision #1 is stronger, and usually my choice.
5) Use Bulleted Text
Revision #2 is a bit blunt. It doesn't flow well from beginning to end. If your writing tends to be in this form, use lots of bulleted text. In this format, brief works great. Further, there's no requirement for even complete sentences.
Subheadings ...
> Flow from headline
> Reveal a major benefit to reader
> Collectively describe page content
> Are often all your visitors sees when scanning
Bulletting allows brevity. And it makes it easy for your readers to follow. One thing I love about this format is that it adds more space to page. It helps to erase that sense of great black globs of text.
6) Edit and rewrite. Then do it again. And again.
Editing often lifts modest work to first rate. But to make this happen, think of this fundamental task as more than editing. Think of it as rewriting. Do so routinely, and your work will improve with every piece you write. Always seek ...
> A better word than one you have used, and a simpler one is best
> Try to replace several words with fewer
> Rewrite an entire sentence, even a paragraph, if you can find a way to make your point more clearly and/or briefly
Wrapping Up
You can beef up your writing just as you can improve any skill. All it takes is time. In above, need for rewriting part of your work is item most often overlooked.
It's tough to impossible to keep all such ideas in mind as you seek to communicate your thoughts. One effective approach is to focus on one idea each time you begin writing.
If you seek to improve one aspect of your work in each writing session, then edit and rewrite, your work will constantly improve. Try it. And see for yourself.
Bob McElwain, author of "Your Path To Success." How to build ANY business you want, just the way you want it, with only pocket money. Get ANSWERS. Subscribe to "STAT News" now! mailto:join-stat@lyris.dundee.net