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But now what? You can’t exactly start listing all things you may have done wrong, hoping to hit right one. Because you may end up listing something that he or she doesn’t know about. How much would that suck? She’s pissed off because you forgot your 3-month anniversary, but you apologize for scratching her car. He didn’t want chicken for dinner again, and you blurt out that you’re boinking his best friend. From here on out, this workout is one we like to call back-pedal. It mainly works brain and tongue. And rest assured, you’ll really work up a sweat with this one. Depending on what you blurt out (and your back-pedal technique), you may actually get to work your upper body as you pack and move your bags.
Another approach is to flatly apologize for whatever you did, even if you have no clue as to what your offense was. If other party is easily dazed or confused, this may work in conjunction with a quick change in subject, or ‘jazz hands.’ It works particularly well if you throw in something other party really likes. An example?
‘Well, whatever I did, I’m sorry. Want to get a sundae at Dairy Queen?’
‘I didn’t mean it. Want some Prada shoes?’ (Then ‘jazz hands’)
This is a nice, quick, low-impact workout. However, if your partner is quick-witted, you may still have to resort to back-pedal. If they’re pros, they’ll get shoes or sundae from you, never verbally accept your apology, and pick up where you left off as soon as you get home.
Just a couple of examples for you. I’m sure you’ve got your own workouts, too, but I’ll still argue that hot monkey lovin’ is way to go.
Oh yeah. One last thing. If at any point during your relationship, you ‘feel burn,’ you might want to visit a clinic.
Soon.
That’s rant.
Copyright 2001 by Kwame DeRoche' SUBSCRIBE FREE! Just e-mail kwamrants-subscribe@yahoogroups.com or visit http://groups.yahoo.com/group/kwamrants
Check out Kwam's other columns at Zromance.com (‘East Meets West’), YouMarriedHim.com (‘A Man's View’), and GetRomantic.com !
I'm a 27-year-old Advertising/Marketing Senior Writer with a slightly skewed perception of the world. I've been writing my rants since early 1999. They're humorous brain-dumps, all about relationships, TV, movies, driving to work...you know, LIFE. And as long as humans are humans, I'll always have something to write about. See more or subscribe at http://groups.yahoo.com/group/kwamrants