When I did this exercise back in 1998, I had my children do it too. We sat around kitchen table and did it together as a family activity. My daughter was eight years old at time and found that she is "giggly, nice, giving, kind, a great friend, smart, funny, and loving." She already knew that, but enjoyed confirmation. My son suffered a lot of emotional insecurities at time because he'd been misdiagnosed as having Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. He was shocked to find that he is "nice follows dreams, strong, giving, active, fast, smart, playful, loving, funny, believes in 'the Force,' laughfull, fun, and brave." I had been telling him for years that he possessed those qualities but he thought I was prejudice because I'm his mom. He began making a huge turn around in his emotional well-being by acknowledging these wonderful traits within himself. I found strength to start my own business and to finally pursue a career as a motivational speaker and writer.

At time, it was pretty easy to tell myself that I am giving, kind, loyal, intelligent, and believe in 'the Force.' On other hand, I really struggled with concepts that I had no worries about money, a joyful attitude, self-confidence, and a sense of humor. I wanted desperately to be like that, but I didn't think I really followed dreams and I wasn't too sure that I wasn't a quitter after all. Over years, I have learned many lessons and have experienced enough of truth of this to know that yes I am exactly those things on that list. I have also learned that things I most despised in others was indeed things I wanted to work on in myself. The rule really does apply in both directions.

As I've been writing this article, I've been thinking about what it would be like to re-do exercise now. Would my children's lists be different? Would mine? I think my children's lists would reflect a more adult perspective, but I think they'd still show most of same traits. I might add some new names to my list, but I suspect that I would come up with a very similar list of traits. We might uncover more traits, but I doubt that we'd remove any. It's most likely that traits follow us throughout our lives. It reminds me of that old saying, "wherever you go, there you are."

In finding our good traits, we uncover our true potential. We have something to live up to. We can measure our conduct and choices against list. How much of our inner-struggle, like my son's, comes from not realizing our gifts? How much comes from realizing our potential and not living up to it? How much easier is life when we are behaving in accordance with our list of virtues? How much better do we feel about ourselves? How much better do others treat us when we live by these traits?

Copyright 2003, Skye Thomas, Tomorrow's Edge

She made me believe that Jesus must have been real. I had never really been quite sure until my three year old talked of him without ever having been taught of him. She seemed so self-assured and at peace with concept. She never spoke of God, just of her buddies and how they all loved to play together. She missed them dearly and yet she was never really alone. I would find her playing with Cracker and Michael in her room all of time. It was all very different from her brother who had an imaginary playmate for a short time. She didn't have to sit and think about it. She didn't giggle as she "played" at having conversations with them. She was at peace with fact that they were as real as her brother and me. Michael was her favorite and he was one who told her precognitive things on a frequent basis.

I wasn't surprised that a child of mine would have a "friend" named Michael who told her things about future. He was a member of our family until ladies at preschool told her that Michael wasn't real and she believed them. Once they convinced her that he wasn't real, she quit "seeing" him. At this point in time, she's not yet convinced herself that he's real and therefore still doesn't "see" or "hear" him anymore. A side effect they probably didn't consider when telling her that Michael was only make believe, is that she no longer "hears" or "sees" or "remembers" Jesus anymore either. By taking her best friend in spiritual world away from her, they also took Jesus away from her. It broke my heart to see her turn away from Michael.

Now that she's older, she's a little bitter about it all. She wants to reconnect with Michael, Cracker, and Jesus, but she just doesn't believe in it all anymore. I tell her that someday, when she's ready, they'll come back to her. They're still here. She hopes I'm right. She's always seemed a bit unsure of herself since losing that deep and amazing spiritual connection with them. She is still a caretaker by nature, but her soul doesn't seem quite so old and wise anymore. She may not remember, but I hold memories for her. The one thing I've learned about guardian angels is that they always look over us whether we believe in them or not.

Copyright 2003, Skye Thomas, Tomorrow's Edge