"Extramarital Affair: Should You Get A Divorce Just Because One Of You Had An Extramarital Affair?"Written by Karl Augustine
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If couple really wants to save their marriage in spite of extramarital affair, then finding out why extramarital affair happened and agreeing on that reason is first step in healing process. If you are currently trying to save your marriage and one of you had an extramarital affair, try to limit your pain that you feel and talk things out with your spouse so you can clearly define and agree upon exactly why extramarital affair took place. If you cannot do this, chances are you will never get over extramarital affair and your marriage most likely won't survive...or at least you won't have a healthy marriage after extramarital affair. After you have defined and agreed upon reason that extramarital affair took place, you must decide whether that reasons (or reasons) warrant actually going through a painful divorce. At this point you have 2 choices...either decide in your own or decide with your spouse. The latter is optimal for a variety of reasons but main reason is that you may actually save your marriage if you decide together. Deciding together whether real reason an extramarital affair took place indicates that you're both really reaching out for something, something you most likely didn't have prior to extramarital affair...togetherness. So, should you get a divorce just because one of you had an extramarital affair? No, not necessarily. Depending on how collaborative you can be with your spouse, how 'detective-like' you can act, and how much soul searching you can do, you may just become stronger together because of an extramarital affair. It may sound odd, but that's truth. Of course, it is entirely possible (and probable) that if you both don't define and agree on why extramarital affair took place and work to address that reason or reasons, your marriage won't ever be healthy again and you'll never be able to healthily survive extramarital affair.
Author of "A Practical Guide To Deciding Whether Or Not To Get A Divorce", the eBook recommended by counselors to thier clients. Proven "Actions Items" to help you decide! http://www.deciding-on-divorce.com Deciding on Divorce Extramarital affair
| | take the child's perspectiveWritten by Darrin F. Coe, MA
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Adults have options to help them get to sleep. Children are required to lay in bed, quiet and still whether they are tired or not. Eventually, they’ll sleep but consider trauma they may experience in process. Behavioral psychology teaches that rewarding positive behavior is more effective than punishing undesirable behavior. Developmental psychology has found soothing sounds, calm environments, and structure positively impact behavior. Stop punishing and start rewarding. Figure out what you want your children to do and reward them for it. Rewards can be complimenting and praising them, small pieces of candy, time spent playing a favorite game, time spent watching a favorite television show, or anything else special to child. Acknowledge them as children who are loved and nurtured. High energy, breaking things, not paying attention, spilling things, running wild and being loud are part of being a child. Children are not miniature adults and shouldn’t be expected to act like adults.
Darrin F. Coe holds a master's degree in professional psychology and is the father of two pre-school boys. contact at http://dcoe1.tripod.com
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