Envisioning Your Ideal "Self"Written by Kimberly Fulcher
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embraced or developed. In kind, if you react to overbearing nature of another individual, you may need to recognize your own tendency to be overbearing.
The Traits of Our Past
We've all experienced moments where we shined. Your may have accomplished something extraordinary. You could have experienced pride as a result of persevering through a difficult situation, or been touched by your ability to contribute to another person's life. It's at these times you were applying positive traits you naturally possess.
Conversely, we've all had experiences that filled us with regret. Perhaps you spoke harshly to someone you care for, or were impatient when with your child or mate. It's in these moments your negative traits were at play. Once you've defined building blocks of your behavior, you're ready to consider way that you'd like to show up in your life.
Your Code of Conduct
I'm not suggesting you move into life with persona of Pollyanna. I'm suggesting you consciously develop a set of standards to govern how you're committed to behaving. In coaching, we refer to this as a Code of Conduct. Your Code of Conduct defines how you'll behave, and determines how others experience you, and how you experience life. What commitments are you willing to make about how you'll conduct yourself?
Act As If
Change doesn't happen over night, but it can be conditioned over time. Once you've defined your ideal self and your Code of Conduct, you'll have a structure to support your behavior. Your next step requires you to begin living as person you've envisioned. Your opportunity to be this person lives in each moment of your life.
Every morning, remind yourself about person you want to be, and reconnect with that vision whenever you begin to slip back into old patterns of behavior. Allow yourself to make mistakes. You will, and that's okay. The commitment you've made to these new standards will gradually meld into beliefs you hold about who you are. Soon, you won't be reminding yourself that you're a nurturing person; you'll be one. You won't be managing your impatience; you will have become more patient. It will happen slowly, but it will happen. Take baby steps. You are walking a new road. Put one foot in front of other, pace yourself, and stay connected to your ideal.
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This material is excerpted from "Life Fitness", written by Kimberly Fulcher, President, Compass Life Designs. Copyright 2003. All rights reserved.
Publication Authorized Solely For Newsletter or Website Use. Not for Resale. Edits Not Authorized.
kimberly_fulcher@compasslifedesigns.com . www.compasslifedesigns.com
Kimberly Fulcher is a professional coach, author and speaker, with 12 years of experience in human development. Kimberly offers group and individual coaching programs, speaks throughout The United States, and will publish her first book “Self Care For SuperWomen” in early 2004.
| | Basics Rules of Life Alignment Written by Edward B. Toupin
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* Organize Your Life: Define and eliminate false hope and desires. Let go of things that are of little consequence in your life. * Plan Your Journey: Learn to change and adjust to move along your path toward your new destinations. Never stop looking ahead and never stop learning. Education reduces fear of failure and of vast unknown. * Take Action: Reward yourself and live life to fullest. Aligning your life involves organization and management of priorities. It is elimination of things that are no longer of any use and alignment of essential items so that they are of greater use to you in your pursuit of your goals. Aligning your life means setting a vision and putting everything in motion to reach that vision. However, an aligned life is never set in stone. Life alignment is a continual, interactive process. As you move forward in life, you will grow and experience new things. As you grow, your ultimate vision changes, as will your alignment processes and plans necessary to achieve personal fulfillment.
Edward B. Toupin is an author, life-strategy coach, counselor, and technical writer living in Las Vegas, NV. Among other things, he authors books, articles, and screenplays on topics ranging from career success through life organization and fulfillment. For more information, e-mail Edward at etoupin@toupin.com or visit his sites at http://www.toupin.com or http://www.make-life-great.com.
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