These are just a few examples of many complex responses to job loss. When you’ve been loyal to an organization and find yourself unexpectedly unemployed, anger is a common reaction. Hiding behind that anger, you’ll often find emotions like hurt and fear. These are natural reactions to assault that you’ve suffered. Your self-esteem, your self-confidence, and your financial security have all been attacked. Your body produces these emotions so you can protect yourself. But when they fester and you begin to exhibit signs of bitterness and insecurity, you can become your own enemy.

5 TIPS FOR RENEWING YOURSELF AFTER JOB LOSS 1.Admit that you are hurt and allow yourself to heal. Take advantage of your employer’s transition assistance program. Join a support group. Talk to a life coach. Get counseling. Don’t let your pain turn into bitterness or insecurity. 2.Release your anger. No matter how hard you try to keep your game face on, if you’re still angry with your former employer, person who is interviewing you for next opportunity will know it. Don’t give your former employer that kind of power over your future prosperity. 3.Give yourself permission to be imperfect. Self-doubts will eat away at your confidence and impair your perception of your own abilities. Give yourself credit for your accomplishments and don’t knock yourself for not being able to single-handedly save your company or department. 4.Nurture yourself. Remember: garbage in, garbage out. Listen to uplifting music. Read empowering materials. Talk to encouraging people. Take responsibility for how you feel by doing things that make you feel good. 5.Explore your interests. Ask yourself what it is that you’d really like to do for a living. Then, do it. Up until now, you’ve done what you had to do. Perhaps it’s time to do what you want to do. Trust that desire has been placed inside of you for a reason and go for it.

It’s possible that you can accomplish any or all of these things on your own. But if you’re stuck, you might want to consider partnering with a friend, a coach, a career counselor or, if necessary, a therapist. You don’t have to go it alone. In fact, having someone to help you to identify your blind spots, make recommendations and hold you accountable will pull you out of your slump much more quickly.

Anita Perez is a career strategist and life coach who works with highly motivated people, helping them to use their intelligence, their rich experiences, and their innate resourcefulness to make things happen in their lives. She helps executives in transition to do what they love and love what they do. Contact Anita via email at coach_anita@yahoo.com or by telephone at 215-369-4060. The first coaching session is always free. www.reach-higher.net

Put lots of romantic images in here! Display pictures or figurines that say romance to you. Pictures of couples kissing, holding hands, anything to “inspire” your loving feelings. Some people intentionally remove any pictures of romance because they don’t want to be reminded that they are lonely. Wrong. You need to be reminded and inspired because it will work to activate you more to seek out a new partner.

4. Activate “man” and “woman” in your space. You should activate your home, your bedroom, your garden, your desk, and your office, and any other space you occupy to increase influence of NW and SW energies.

FOR WOMEN ONLY: To activate “MAN” area (NW) in your space:

Desk: Put a phone or fax here, add a radio, or put computer on this corner of your desk, place a picture of a handsome man here, or add a moving metal sculpture; (metal pendulum clocks are great).

Home/Living Room: Put your television or stereo in NW sector (unless it is bedroom). Or, you can put manly objects in this area if it is your bedroom. Objects such as books a man might read (or your ideal man would read!), sports page, or a picture of a handsome man (or men? Chippendale’s calendar, maybe?) in this location is good.

Bedroom: A CD player with romantic music that you listen to nightly would be wonderful in a NW corner of bedroom.

Yard: Place a shepherd’s hook here and hang a windchime on it. Anything metal would be excellent here.

Office: Gold windchime with a fan gently blowing to make it tinkle softly. This is also a good idea in living room.

FOR WOMEN AND MEN: Remember, both women and men want to activate SW corner of their homes, bedrooms, living rooms, offices, and desks! That’s because SW corresponds to romance, marriage, and women.

To activate “WOMAN” and “ROMANCE” area (SW) in your space try these ideas: Desk: Place a beautiful stone (such as rose quartz) or a beautiful vase in SW corner of your desk. You can make a copy of double happiness symbol and place it on this corner; it’s believed to make married men out of confirmed bachelors. Add red items in this location, crystal objects (a crystal pendulum clock would be wonderful here!), or red crystal paperweight is also a perfect addition. You will also want to place a copy of “Double Happiness” symbol here.

Home/Living Room: Make sure SW sectors of your home and living room have love objects appropriate to SW corner. This can be a terracotta or porcelain vase, candles, picture of a mountain, such as Ayers Rock, would be especially auspicious.

Bedroom: A CD player with romantic music that you listen to nightly would be wonderful in a SW corner of bedroom. Place a lamp in this corner and make sure it stays on at least 3 hours a day. Better still, keep it on entire day while you are out!

Yard: Place a large boulder or group of boulders here. Or, place a cement bench in this location. You may also wish to put a statue of a couple in this location, or plant some red or pink flowers here.

Office: Add a picture here of a mountain (provided it is not directly in front of you), or some other romantic scene that is tasteful. A lamp in this location is also a good idea.

5. Eliminate old to bring in new. If you have pictures of old boyfriends and girlfriends hanging around, then they’re still there! Get rid of pictures and mementos. Make sure that you have new sheets, too, to sleep on. Old energy can linger in bed as well.

One single woman (she was divorced) had pictures of her ex everywhere and wondered why her love life was poor. What man wants to compete with a former boyfriend – or worse, an ex-husband.

6. Employ some “magic.” Some feng shui stems from Chinese folklore and superstition. But if it helps you draw Mr. or Ms. Right, who cares, right?

•Rainbows for love. Hang a crystal in SW windows. Then, let sun’s rays shine on crystal to create rainbows in SW sector of your house for extra romantic energy in your space.

•Use a magic box. This is said to draw a spouse to you. Purchase a silver box, either round or square shaped. Write your deepest desires for a spouse on a piece of paper. Place this box in SW or NW corner of house, in a cupboard or out of sight. A square box should be placed in SW and a round box in NW.