On his return, I exposed him to that poor woman. He was leaving her. The surprise? I said I would never ever take him back for a day - leave or stay is nothing of my business. I have fallen in love with a man not a mutt. Obviously, I had no love to give now that person is someone else. One thing I did right: I did not get confused; I did not ‘forgive' and never intended to trust again. Why would I need to do that? Love? It is not love on his part; and I can not be true to who was false to me. I cannot love who does not mind hurting me, betraying my trust, fooling and using me. Can you? Those who do that to you hate not love you; wake-up!

We are all willing to correct something that went wrong. But in these situations only thing that is wrong is to be in love with a cheating heart. No, you are not overweight, not boring, not sexually uninspiring. You did not neglect them. No, you could have not given them more passion, compassion or validation. No, you do need to be blonde, beautiful, more fashionable, better-educated, smarter, richer or younger to keep them. If they would stray they do anyway. Khan did that to Rita Haywarth, Charles to Diana, Kennedy to Jackie ( and to Marlyn Monroe herself). Cruise left Kidman for Cruz, and that guy left his wife of 22years for a 25years younger Zeta-Jones. The other woman might have something above you and might not. It is not about her; it is about him. When a man loves a woman, he fails to see all Marlyns in world. He would not trade his Juliet for glory of God himself. When a man loves a woman, he is committed to her. Yes, he does not go to vacations with someone else to fix something else. When he does not love her, he cries, throws tantrums, threatens suicide. Throw him out of door; and he will knock other one with same tears dribbling, same cracking voice and trembling hands begging for a ‘second chance'. No one should be given a second chance, when first one was a very long generous opportunity for love and happiness they paid back in hate, hurt, misery and suffering.

I wish I do not see all tearful messages I see in my life and online from women complaining about ‘the-still-love-him' anguish; love yourself first! I wish women knew how to give less, forgive less, love less to get more respect.

But then, we're faced with another dilemma.....What if they turn up and I'm not there? They'll hang up and, what's worse, they'll think I'm not really nice person I am because I wasn't there to show them what a really nice person I am and......@#$#%%@ burnt biscuits!!

So you stay there, on end of phone, humming to dulcet strains of "I Left My Soul in Some Elevator" played in D minor (hey, isn't everything?) on something which is pretending to be a baby grand but is obviously computer-generated by same digital dolly apologising for your inconvenience but assuring you that your call is important to her...

And wait for your call to progress in queue.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Carol Dorman is a WAHM from Sydney, Australia and publisher of Nurture Nurturers ezine - "the ezine for every woman, everywhere" To subscribe mailto:5016-subscribe@zinester.com To request her FREE report titled: EARN $$ WHILE PROTECTING YOUR FAMILY mailto:bewell@freeautobot.com ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~