What You Can Do

Talk with your child about setting reachable goals. For example, help him break big tasks into little tasks that can be accomplished one at a time. Have child pick a task and set a deadline for completing it. When deadline has passed, check together to see if task was completed.

Help your child build a sense of her competence. To do this, she needs experiences of success, no matter how small. This builds confidence and effort for next time.

Keep making tasks just a little more challenging but doable.

· Discuss with your child how to say no. Sometimes children don't know how to say no to peers who ask them to do dangerous or risky things. After identifying ways that she might be tempted, teach your child a three-step process for self-protection:

1. Apply "trouble" rule: Will this action break a law or rule?

2. Make a good decision--think carefully about risks or possible consequences.

3. Act fast to avoid trouble, using options such as following:

--Say no!

--Leave.

--Make a joke

--Suggest something better to do.

--Make an excuse such as, "My dad will get really mad."

--Act shocked.