Can you come up with 3 ways to measure success for yourself? Remember, there is not a universal standard or “right” definition of success. Define what’s truly important to you. Once you’ve figured out what success means to you, you can realign your life, goals, and relationships around these priorities.

A great way to start process of defining success is to complete these sentences:

The people I view as successful are…. I feel successful when….. My symbols of success are…. I will feel like a success when I….

You’ll need to work with your statements until they feel or sound just right. Once you’ve defined success, start taking action to reach it. Set powerful goals and get support you need to reach them. Expect and learn how to cope with barriers such as fear of change, your “yeah buts” and fear of identity change.

Success is a process that never ends. As you reach height of one goal you’ll see another mountaintop you’ll want to climb. Along way, don’t forget to appreciate what you already have and to celebrate each small accomplishment that leads to grand prize!

Ann Ronan, Ph.D., Certified Career Coach and author, works with professionals in career transition. She offers a FREE e-course on the Top Ten Ways To Live Authentically. To learn more about this step-by-step program and to sign up for FREE how-to articles and FREE teleclasses, visit http://www.authenticlifeinstitute.com.

Enlist help of a friend or two. You may feel that you will be able to cope but having support close by will be very helpful should you find that you are feeling too upset to appear.

The Will

It's an unfortunate fact that funerals can often bring out worst in people. Some of most long-lasting family arguments have started at a funeral, with squabbles over who should get what. You may find yourself surprised at just who is able to throw themselves into such arguments, even though they are in midst of their own grief.

You may find yourself being quizzed at graveside. People can be very clever in their approach, offering condolences and then adding innocent question of what deceased has left to whom. You may also find yourself target of malicious comments regarding your 'improved financial situation'. There can be more hidden rivalry within families than most would imagine.

You mustn't allow yourself to be drawn into arguments. Simply pretend to ignore any unwanted comments and questions. If they persist, explain that you are far too upset to think about such matters at moment and that if they've been mentioned in will then they will be contacted in due course.

In case of a will never having been made and where there is any disagreement regarding who has right to what, explain that you will appoint a solicitor to handle estate and explain, as above, that they will be contacted in due course.

The Following Days

Some people find themselves terribly alone in days following funeral, whereas others feel that they never have any time to themselves to grieve. Remember that others cannot read your mind anymore than you can read theirs, they're simply doing what they believe to be right.

If they choose to stay away, they are probably doing so out of respect for your privacy. If they choose to spend as much time as possible with you, this will be because they fear for your ability to cope alone. Explain to them what your needs are. If you need people around you, phone some friends and ask them to visit. If you need to be alone, explain this politely and ask if you may phone them should you need their company. You'll find that most people are very accommodating as long as they understand your needs.

The loss of a loved one is never easy and nobody will ever expect it to be. For some funeral seems to pass as just a hazy memory, leaving a feeling of guilt at not remembering details of this last farewell. Remember that it's memories you have of person when alive that are important, and it's these that will remain clear to you in future. During deep grief it can be very difficult to grasp details of what's happening but this does not mean you didn't care. Quite opposite in fact.