2. UNDERSTAND THEIR MOTIVES.

Yes, they're after attention, adulation, etc., but key is - at expense of what. If they're running rough-shod over team-mates, customers, or you, it's not going to work. If they're performing well and being respectful ENOUGH of your people, policies and procedures, find out what makes them smile (raise, percs, time off) and give them more of it.

3. DETERMINE THEIR CHARACTER.

Some people manage some annoying personality traits (such as arrogance and perfectionism) without being unethical or abusive. They may 'present' and 'talk' more than they act out. The thing to test for is do they consider themselves (1) indispensable or (2) above law. No one is either, and if you harbor one in fold, it will turn out to be a wolf in sheep's clothing and you will have no one to blame but yourself.

4. DETERMINE YOUR ABLIITY TO DEAL WITH THE STAR.

Some can, some can't. You have to have a lot of EQ to deal with heir apparent. 5. BE DIRECT AND IMMEDIATE.

The heir apparent tends to continually be planning a coup d'etat. When you catch wind of it - and your nose for catching wind had best be sharp - call him in, confront him, tell him to stop in no uncertain terms, and then monitor. Calling them on it immediately is crucial. They don't back off to subtleties.

6. GIVE THEM A HOME RUN PITCH.

Consider confining them to a singular role. If you have kind of situation where you can put them on a lone project, do so. They like to hit home runs, and may well score one for you.

7. CAN THEY EVER FUNCTION AS PART OF A TEAM?

Let them answer that question for you. Immerse them in team work and meetings. If you're not sure they can be part of gang, give them more of gang to deal with. They will sink or swim. You're providing water for experiment.

8. GIVE OTHER 'TESTS'.

All things you've heard about prima donnas, you can go ahead and test out. Ask them to do what everyone else has to do, and see how they function. Are they willing to get into trenches? Make coffee? Stay late? (Use your own EQ, and do this with respect. You accomplish nothing if you're a prima donna too, and don't treat people with respect.)

The aggressive ones you'll ferret out right away. It's passive-aggressive ones whose nonverbal communication you'll have to be able to read.

9. THEY AREN'T SUBTLE. THROW OUT THE GAUNTLET.

In other words, draw line. If they're kind that has to step over it, better to find out sooner than later.

10. GET PROACTIVE.

They will want to perform on their own terms. YOU dictate what that means within your relationship or organization.

Managed right and accommodated to just enough, they'll bring you money, clients, fame and fortune. Well, okay, they'll do a great job for you. They're special after all!

Heck, dim lights if you can and play Pachelbel's "Canon Number 9" in background from CD "The Most Relaxing Music in Universe"! For your benefit, if not for theirs.

3. PROVIDE STRUCTURE.

Let them vent for a minute or two, and enjoy it. Then look at your watch (a concrete representation of "time") and say, "Well it's time to get down to business."

4. MAKE IT TIME-LIMITED.

Whether socially or professionally, they can be draining, so set time-limited activities. "Let's meet for lunch at 1. I have to pick up kids at 3, so I'll need to leave at 2:30 and that will give us plenty of time to visit."

5. ALLOW FOR MOTOR RELEASE OF TENSION WHEN POSSIBLE.

(But remove things like coffee cups from vicinity of those moving limbs.) Schedule a lunch meeting where you have to walk several blocks to get to restaurant. They talk better walking beside someone than in typical office situation - having to sit still and look at someone.

6. REMOVE DISTRACTIONS.

If you need to conduct business, provide an agenda. Refer to it when things get off-track. "Ok, that's good. Now let's move on to point 7." Put phone on DND. You'll have your hands full just with this person. You don’t need more going on, and you need them focusing on task as much as possible.

7. WHATEVER YOU DO, DON'T ASK OPEN-ENDED QUESTIONS.

These people need to be pinned in with simple "yes" or "no" questions.

8. ALLOW FOR IMPETUOSITY.

They can get carried away. If you think they've made a premature decision, back up and rephrase, saying, "Let's rethink this a moment." This allows them to collect their thoughts and remove some of emotion. Hyperbole and histrionics are part of their style. Enjoy it, keep your distance, and discount everything about 50%.

9. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF.

Employ tactics that calm you when you're under barrage. Breathe deeply, look away or defocus your eyes, consciously relax your muscles, be patient, don't try to "fix" anything.

10. FOLLOW-UP IN WRITING.

After meeting, send a written memo re: accountability. Go over main points. Sometimes allow them to “get back to you” on things.