Dealing with Difficult People: the Idealist

Written by Susan Dunn, MA, Emotional Intelligence Coach


Continued from page 1

4. Redirect their idealism when it gets inrepparttar way of their day-to-day functioning.

Help them find a time and place for it. Empathize withrepparttar 130012 feelings. Turn them back torepparttar 130013 task.

5. Don't put them in positions such as quality control unless you want to explainrepparttar 130014 difference between "perfect" and "good enough" a million times.

6. Assign them teaching and mentoring tasks.

Their gentle personalities make them a natural at this. They're usually excellent at cooperative goals

7. If you give them a management task, remind them they can't just think or say how it should be, and should be done, they will have to get people to do it – human beings who engage in human error, who may not want to, or don’t know how to.

In other words, it will involve getting their hands dirty.

8. Let them be go-betweens.

If they understandrepparttar 130015 project and mission, they make wonderful ambassadors and diplomats. They don't need to be representing a nation, they'll do this with dignity and excellence within your family and organization.

9. When you ask them something, add atrepparttar 130016 end, "And how would we do this in practical steps?"

Else they'll stay up in their head. Do NOT reward them for perfectionism. Excellence, yes. Perfect? It's only, well, an ideal, yes?

10. Keep them from devoting an undue amount of time torepparttar 130017 underdog. Unless that's their job, of course.

Let them know that's your job (or someone else's within your organization or family). They're natural-born advocates, making great coaches, lawyers, social workers, teachers, and mediators.

©Susan Dunn, MA, Emotional Intelligence Coach, http://www.susandunn.cc . Coaching, business programs, Internet classes, teleclasses and ebooks around Emotional Intelligence. I train and certify EQ coaches. Mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc for information on this fast, affordable, flexible, no-residency program. For FREE ezine, email me and put “ezine” for subject line. Check out the best ebook library on the internet - www.webstrategies.cc/ebooklibrary.html .


Need to Change Something?

Written by Susan Dunn, MA, Emotional Intelligence Coach


Continued from page 1

Change as loss? Well, if it’s a good change, we don’t have as much trouble dealing with it. Or do we? You’d think that winningrepparttar lottery would be a “good” change, but studies show that many people simply can’t adjust to it. See what I mean about becoming change-proficient? Wouldn’t it be a shame to winrepparttar 130010 lottery and go under fromrepparttar 130011 stress of it?

Andrepparttar 130012 changes we don’t want, that signalrepparttar 130013 loss of something important to us, or beloved by us, require allrepparttar 130014 courage, skills and buoyancy we can muster.

The goal is not to sink into resolute self-pity or bitterness, but to rise again. “Affliction comes to us, “said H. G. Wells, British philosopher, “not to make us sad, but sober; not to make us sorry but wise.”

If you decide to develop resilience keep in mindrepparttar 130015 stretch may cause some growing pains at first. To quote Wells again, “You have learned something. That always feels at first as if you had lost something.”

When you give uprepparttar 130016 idea that things are going to berepparttar 130017 same, you will have lost something. What will you have gained?

Most people who begin to work mindfully on their Emotional Intelligence experience immediate beneficial changes. Some are even exhilarated. Managingrepparttar 130018 emotional component of any circumstance or event may well berepparttar 130019 crucial feature to how you cope. Notice it’s “manage,” not “control.”

If things are changing allrepparttar 130020 time, and it’s getting to you, you can learn how to not let it get to you. And then you will have lost something … but what will you have gained?

©Susan Dunn, MA, Emotional Intelligence Coach, http://www.susandunn.cc . Coaching, business programs, Internet classes, teleclasses and ebooks around Emotional Intelligence. I train and certify EQ coaches. Mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc for information on this fast, affordable, flexible, no-residency program. For FREE ezine, email me and put “ezine” for subject line. Check out the best ebook library on the Internet - www.webstrategies.cc/ebooklibrary.html .


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