3. Ask each party to state possible solutions.

4. Help parties agree on some possible solutions, by re-iterating what has been said, suggesting possible compromises, and trying to help generate other alternative solutions.

5. The mediator should help parties put agreement in writing, have parties sign, and then sign it as a witness. Each party should receive a copy of written agreement, and mediator should keep a copy on file for future reference.

6. The mediator should periodically follow up with parties to see how things are going, and help parties address any concerns which arise.

7. The results of mediation should be kept confidential, between parties and mediator. (At some times, results of mediation may need to be shared with mediator's immediate supervisor, but this will depend on nature of situation, and your university's policies. In many cases, this is only necessary in situations where a person may be in danger or when serious breaches of University Policy or law have occurred.)

Direct Room Changes

If you know someone who you would like to switch rooms with, you can sometimes arrange a direct room switch. This involves talking to person or people who handle room assignments at your school. At some schools, this is Resident Director/Area Coordinator, at others it may be someone in another university office. Be sure to bring person who you want to switch rooms with you when you go to request a direct room change. The assignments officer will want to make sure that person wants to switch rooms. You may have to fill out some forms to make switch official. If approved, people simply exchange rooms with each other, by checking out of their old room and into their new ones.

Usually, students must officially turn in their keys at Residence Life Office or Commons Desk, and then check out a key to their new assignment.

Residents at many schools are welcome to advertise for direct room changes on general postings bulletin boards in campus buildings. Some schools may even have "room switch wanted" bulletin boards in designated areas around residence halls.

Emergency Room Changes

At many schools, you can meet with Resident Director/Area Coordinator to ask about an emergency room change. These are granted at discretion of this staff member, if there is an open space of proper classification (undergraduate male, undergraduate female, graduate male, graduate female). If space is not currently available, you may be placed on a waiting list.

Most schools have criteria which define what constitutes an emergency. These usually include situations where there is some immediate threat to a student's safety, or when there are irreconcilable differences (after mediation has been tried).

While decision is usually left to discretion of staff member processing room change, most residence life departments have established criteria for when they will not move people to a new assignment. In many cases, room changes will not be arranged until a mediation has been tried, and a room change request may be denied if it is based on complaints about a roommate's race, religion, ethnicity, disability, or sexual orientation. To learn more about your school's room change policies, talk to your Resident Assistant, or another member of Residence Life staff.

Should You Try to Get Out of Your Housing Contract?

At most schools, housing agreement is a legally binding contract. Releases are usually granted only under rare and extenuating circumstances (withdrawal from school, marriage, medical problems, etc.) It is important to note that releases are usually not granted because of roommate conflicts, because other options are available through Residence Life staff (mediation, room changes, disciplinary action).

Requests for contract release must usually be made in writing to assignment officer or to Director of Residence Life or Housing. The conditions which might warrant granting you a release and procedures for requesting such a release should be spelled out in your housing contract. That is why it is important to read and understand your school's housing contract and its provisions. If you didn't keep a copy of housing contract, you should be able to request one from your Residence Life or Housing Office.

If your school does not require students to sign a contract to live in campus housing, it is probably wise to consult with someone before you move out. Start by talking with a member of Residence Life or Housing staff. This person should be able to advise you about preferred procedure. It is important to get a contract release or other clearance to move out from school, so that you don't end up getting billed for housing. If Residence Life or Housing will not grant you a release and you still feel it is in your best interest, you may want to:

a.) Ask your parents to call school

b.) Ask to talk with someone higher in school's organizational structure (for example, a Dean of Students, Vice President for Student Affairs,President, or Chancellor)

c.) Talk with a lawyer. (This should only be used as a last resort.)

dn the roommate man

Noise

You and your roommates are friends, you've partied together, you like each other. However, noise is one of things that can drive a wedge into that friendship. Decide before you move in when "quiet hours" will be. Does everyone have to turn TV or stereo down after 10 on week nights? Are parties allowed on weekends, and if so, what arrangements must be made ahead of time with other roommates?

Guests

Come to some agreement about overnight guests, both of romantic type and those who expect to sleep on couch. If you only have one living room couch, it will be kind of difficult for two roommates' sisters to sleep on it, so how do you reserve it? And what about those boyfriends/girlfriends who all but move in?

Food

Are you going to share food expenses and eat your meals together, or is it every man/woman for him/her self? How will you share responsibilities for cooking and shopping? How will you know whose food is whose?

Cleaning/Maintenance

How clean will you keep apartment? Who is responsible for which household chores? When should those chores be done?

Moving Out

What happens if one roommate needs to leave before lease ends? How much notice should he or she give? Does he or she need to find a replacement roommate (with approval of other roommates and landlord)?

Mediation

Your landlord has no obligation to enforce any agreement made between roommates. There are mediation services which can be used to mediate legal disputes between roommates. Decide ahead of time what you'll do if you come to an impasse.

Get it in Writing

NOLO provides this sample roommate agreement which you can use as a template for making your written agreement with your new roommates. It should clearly spell out "rules" governing your co-tenancy and be signed by each roommate. If you want, you can even take it to a notary public and have it notarized, though that's not really necessary.

dan the roommate man