Years later it dawned on me. What I had previously thought of as “Sherry can” and “I can’t” (but ought to) was actually nothing more than her interest in something and my lack of interest.

So it is with many things in life that become basis for self put-downs. It’s not often that we simply can’t do something or aren’t good at it (math, writing, public speaking, handy work, mechanics, etc.). Generally, it’s just that our interests lie elsewhere.

Now, if Sherry is doing something like building a fence I try to help. If she’s doing something in which I feel I’d just be in way, I find something in which I have a greater interest – a good book. Then, we’re both happy.

BARBER-OSOPHY: There’s a vast difference in “I can’t” and “I’m not interested.”

Copyright 2004, Sumerlin Enterprises

Permission is granted to reprint this article as long as a link to www.barber-osophy.com is included.

5. STOP Settling This is similar to stop tolerating, but not exactly same. Where in your life do you talk yourself into settling for less than you want, need, or desire? Are you willing to stop telling yourself no? I am. If you really want something, make a plan to get it –even if it takes you longer than it would if you settled—because when you make investment in what you really want, you’ll find you want a lot less!

6. Be kinder and gentler with yourself I think we’ve become too hard on ourselves. We tell ourselves all kinds of crazy stories about what we “should” be achieving, how we “should” be spending time and all we should be getting done. Then we get frustrated because we’re just not up to snuff! Our ridiculous expectations sabotage us daily. Imagine if we just eliminated “should” from our vocabulary? Try it for a week. Or, a day. How much kinder and gentler do you feel?

7. Take stock Where is there abundance in your life? Where do you have it just way you want it? Where have you made huge gains toward being who you most want to be? Take stock of what is great about you, your life, your relationships, your job, your home, etc… In this New Year focus on good things you have chosen for yourself rather than on all deficits and imperfections. Resolve to take stock continually and appreciate all good you can, and do, bring into your life.

8. Get some sunshine every day For those of you in sunshine states, this is probably easy. But for rest of us suffering through dreary and long stretch of winter ahead, making sure we actually see sunlight and breath fresh air during day is critical to feeling happy and well. Don’t sit at your desk from dark of morning to dark of night without going outside. Make it a point, even on snowiest day, to step outside and breathe in air during midday.

************************************************** This article may be reproduced, in its entirety, along with following information: This article is provided courtesy of Shawn Driscoll, Career and Business Coach. If you are ready to Succeed, on your own terms, contact shawn@succeedcoaching.com or visit www.succeedcoaching.com.