3. Compassion gives you a sense of connectedness.

Having compassion means opening your heart to others. It also means residing in your heart when interacting with others. This can be especially challenging when compassion is most needed. But it is well worth effort.

When you show others compassion, they get to experience being heard and cared for when most needed. This allows you to connect with others in a meaningful way and feel more alive and loved.

Your Relationship Coach, Rinatta Paries www.WhatItTakes.com

(c) Rinatta Paries, 1998-2002. Do you know how to attract your ideal mate? Do you know how to build a fulfilling relationship, or how to reinvent yours to meet your needs? Relationship Coach Rinatta Paries can teach you skills and techniques to attract and sustain long-term, healthy partnerships. Visit www.WhatItTakes.com where you'll find quizzes, classes, advice and a free weekly ezine. Become a "true love magnet(tm)!"

For example, if we grow up in a loving, family environment, then we learn values that are essential to creation and establishment of a loving environment. If we grow up in a hostile environment, then we will learn values that are essential to maintaining a hostile environment. People always turn to that which is familiar, regardless of how wonderful or harsh, because familiarity provides security and acceptance.

--- Understanding Your System ---

In every case, you have to understand various information and aspects of your life that shaped your belief system. When your belief system no longer provides support for your direction and desires, then you will be aware of what has shaped your beliefs to limit you.

When you do reach outer wall of basic belief system, you can become stressed, depressed, lost, and unable to move down your path. In this case, you begin to lose hope and simply settle into a lifestyle that is "just there" and you cannot go beyond where your system allows you to go.

You must understand your system to change your system. This is accomplished by examining things that are important to you and determining things that have shaped your beliefs. Some of these things, you will find, are no longer important and are simply holding you back. Other things, of new importance, appear just outside of your reach and cause you stress because you cannot reach them---unless you change your system.

--- Changing Your System ---

It is important to realize that if you always do what you've always done then you'll always receive what you've always received. To move forward and build on your current foundation, it is important to continually reinvent yourself and make changes to your basic belief system.

Reinventing yourself and changing your belief system does not mean completely eliminating things that are important. Just as you would not quit your job without having something else available, you cannot expect to completely eliminate your current system and values and expect to succeed. It is a process of changing or eliminating things that no longer work, using things that are available to suit your direction, and determining how to acquire resources necessary to reach your ultimate destination. It is a process that moves at your own pace.

--- What's next? ---

Once you're able to analyze your current system and determine where it is that you ultimately want to be, you will be able to determine changes necessary to create a new and workable system for you. The next step is to implement your changes and become proactive in your life. You will then be on your way to a new and fulfilling life!

Good luck!