People do not always want help. They do not always want to feel of impact you may provide, no matter how good or well intended it might be. The trouble is that once you have launched yourself in this way, you cannot retract it. Like it or not an impact will occur, all that you can do is attempt to lessen it. So how do you go about lessening impact you are making on someone's life? There you are, already launched. How are you going to restrain impact?

I recall watching a film a while ago, in which some overeager person hit a missile launch button. The missile was enroute to target when it was realized that it was a mistake! What's more, self-destruct button failed to initialise onboard sequence. They had two choices left open to them - evacuate or use another missile to destroy first that was launched manually from an aircraft.

So what are your options if your "missile" has been launched and you want to avoid impact or at least lessen it? They are as follows:

1.Send an auto-destruct sequence - can you say or do something that will stop "missile" in its tracks and thus prevent any impact?

2.Manually destroy "missile" -Can you say or do anything that will cause any previous situation to be totally dissipated or deflected out of harms way?

3.Lesson impact - What can you say or do that although will not prevent impact, so that it will cause least amount of damage possible?

4.Evacuate area of impact - Can you move target so that although they are aware and damage may be done, lives are salvaged?

Personal impact is not all bad though. Notice how ripple of impact in fluid (and even in some examples of solid impact), does not change matter itself but simply form matter takes and direction it takes. Ripples in liquid, form circular ridges flowing outward, in line with strength of impact. In people's lives, we often cause ripples that do not change character themselves necessarily, but do affect their direction and strength. An important factor to understand here is that such affects may be for good or bad. We all need to offload our cares and trials from time to time, and when we do this, it makes us feel good. We feel so much lighter for doing so. Our problem or concerns may not be solved, but somehow we just feel better for doing so. It is good to have friends who can share our burdens. It is important though to remember that our friends too will have their own concerns. What's more your problems will be a concern to them simply because they are your friends! Oh dear! Does this mean that we should not really be burdening our friends with issues in our lives? No not all. What it means is that we all need buffer zones. We, if you like, make ourselves targets for points of impact for each other.

Impact upon lives of others exists as natural fact. How we deal with impacts when they occur is softened by simple task of listening to each other. Being listening ear - providing shoulder can sometimes be all that is required. You may not be a "professional" in dealing with problems of others, but one thing you can be - one thing that really lessens impact of less thinking people upon people you know - you can be their friend - their true friend. Your impact then really does change people's lives. It changes them for better. Go and be a friend, play a part in their "circles of destiny".

Anticipate complications

Watch out for complications once you know that your loved one is in distress. Be aware of any changes such as suicidal and homicidal behavior and aggression. If not showing actual destructive behavior, ask for any thoughts of death or wanting to die or to kill.

Inquiring about presence of suicidal or homicidal thought will not push your loved one to act destructively. In fact, your loved one might be encouraged to disclose more information and to express well-kept emotions.

Remedy with Early Intervention

Early intervention requires you to first accept or acknowledge that a problem exists and urgent need to address it. Being in denial can only make matters worse. Denial interferes in recognizing on-going problem.

Assist in addressing your loved ones pressing issues. Offer to provide some financial support or to contact appropriate government agencies. For someone in legal trouble, suggest obtaining advice of a good lawyer.

Be available and supportive. Reassure your loved ones that you will be in their side no matter what. Let them talk about their worries and travails. Provide a listening ear. Avoid arguments and criticisms. Show empathy.

Be alert for signs of destructive behavior such as wrist slashing, overdosing, verbalizing death, agitated behavior, writing or changing a will, and giving away properties. If your loved one is in distress, clarify if one has entertained destructive thoughts.

Call for help. Because suicidal and homicidal behavior requires immediate help, further delay is a not an option. Call mental health hotline, mental health services, or emergency rooms to seek guidance and to ask for next step. Do not hesitate to call law enforcement agencies or mental health crisis team if your loved one refuses to get help.

Educate Yourself

Knowing about illness, dos and don’ts, and how to best cope is a powerful way of dealing with suicide or other destructive behavior. Furthermore, education helps you get rid of misconception, self-blame, guilt, and shame.

In summary, suicide, like cancer, has only one goal – death. It has caused agony, sleepless nights, and oceans of tears for those who are left behind. However, despite its deadly intentions, suicide is also a cry for help. Fortunately, simple steps such as CARE approach make suicide surmountable.