Strong "I" statements have three specific elements:

1. Behaviour 2. Feeling 3. Tangible effect (consequence to you)

Example: "I feel frustrated when you are late for meetings. I don't like having to repeat information."

Six techniques for assertive communication ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ There are six assertive techniques - let's look at each of them in turn.

1. Behaviour Rehearsal: which is literally practising how you want to look and sound. It is a very useful technique when you first want to use "I" statements, as it helps dissipate any emotion associated with an experience and allows you to accurately identify behaviour you wish to confront.

2. Repeated Assertion (the 'broken record'): this technique allows you to feel comfortable by ignoring manipulative verbal side traps, argumentative baiting and irrelevant logic while sticking to your point. To most effectively use this technique use calm repetition, and say what you want and stay focused on issue. You'll find that there is no need to rehearse this technique, and no need to 'hype yourself up' to deal with others.

Example:

"I would like to show you some of our products" "No thank you, I'm not interested" "I really have a great range to offer you" "That may be true, but I'm not interested at moment" "Is there someone else here who would be interested?" "I don't want any of these products" "Okay, would you take this brochure and think about it?" "Yes, I will take a brochure" "Thank you" "You're welcome"

3. Fogging: this technique allows you to receive criticism comfortably, without getting anxious or defensive, and without rewarding manipulative criticism. To do this you need to acknowledge criticism, agree that there may be some truth to what they say, but remain judge of your choice of action. An example of this could be, "I agree that there are probably times when I don't give you answers to your questions.

4. Negative enquiry: this technique seeks out criticism about yourself in close relationships by prompting expression of honest, negative feelings to improve communication. To use if effectively you need to listen for critical comments, clarify your understanding of those criticisms, use information if it will be helpful or ignore information if it is manipulative. An example of this technique would be, "So you think/believe that I am not interested?"

5. Negative assertion: this technique lets you look more comfortably at negatives in your own behaviour or personality without feeling defensive or anxious, this also reduces your critics' hostility. You should accept your errors or faults, but not apologise. Instead, tentatively and sympathetically agree with hostile criticism of your negative qualities. An example would be, "Yes, you're right. I don't always listen closely to what you have to say."

6. Workable compromise: when you feel that your self-respect is not in question, consider a workable compromise with other person. You can always bargain for your material goals unless compromise affects your personal feelings of self-respect. However, if end goal involves a matter of your self-worth and self-respect, THERE CAN BE NO COMPROMISE. An example of this technique would be, "I understand that you have a need to talk and I need to finish what I'm doing. So what about meeting in half an hour?"

Conclusion ~~~~~~~~~~ Assertiveness is a useful communication tool. It's application is contextual and it's not appropriate to be assertive in all situations. Remember, your sudden use of assertiveness may be perceived as an act of aggression by others.

There's also no guarantee of success, even when you use assertive communication styles appropriately.

"Nothing on earth can stop individual with right mental attitude from achieving their goal; nothing on earth can help individual with wrong mental attitude" W.W. Ziege

A lot of people will scan your email so you need to make your subheads give a complete selling message by themselves. Also, be sure to use different graphic embellishments.

7. Eliminate excess wording: Simplify. Convey your message in a clear and concise manner -- but remember that doesn't mean 'keep it short'.

My personal guru of direct marketing, Ted Nicholas, repeatedly states that copy can never be too long, just too boring . All things considered equal, longer copy will always outperform shorter copy, AS LONG AS copy is compelling and not boring. And you need to ruthlessly edit your email for flow.

8. Use action verbs whenever possible: If you see too many "as", "is", "was" or "were" replace them. Sentences using action verbs are more powerful.

When writing your email you want it clear enough so that any high school student can understand it. Now, you probably think that your prospects/clients are a lot smarter than average high school student. But nobody has time anymore to sit down and figure out what you're trying to say -- so keep your writing simple and straightforward.

Oh, and go through your text and cut out word "that" wherever you possibly can. It's a 'dead' word that reduces impact of any sentence.

Or you might like to read above sentence as: It's a dead word and reduces impact of any sentence.

Which one do you think is more powerful?

Important particulars ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ There are a few important points you need to be aware of.

1. Always give people option of being removed from your mailing list. Very important now that Privacy Laws are coming in all around world and spam levels are so high.

2. Make your links 'clickable'. In order to make it easy for people to go straight from your email to your website you need to make your links 'clickable'. Here's how a link should be written in your email: http://www.yoursite.com.au

Most email programs will recognise this as a link.

And if you want to make an email link you should write it as mailto:emailaddress@yoursite.com.au

Well, that's it. Happy writing!