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Perhaps you need more time or emotional growth before you consider making a long-term commitment.
If you'd like to deal with past relationship feelings, I have an article on this at http://www.consum-mate.com/02jul.htm.
If you are unsure if you are relationship ready, check out my article on this at http://www.consum-mate.com/03jun.htm
If lack of self-awareness is an issue, check out http://www.consum-mate.com/02aug.htm
Greater self-knowledge will help you to overcome this block to building a lasting and satisfying relationship.
The second issue is
inability to make a commitment to a PARTICULAR relationship. This may not be right one. Perhaps there is a sense of this but it is written off to being a "commitment -phobe" in general.
Focus on true level of involvement with each other. Is there a genuine connection? Or is there a vague feeling of something missing? Evaluate quality of your intimate relating. This does not mean how often (or even how good) sex is. This is about how open, sharing and real you are in your interactions with each other.
Does any of this sound familiar?
It seems like we are only killing time? He/she doesn't seem to want what I want. We seem to be off and on in our level of contact/affection. I hey are still not over a past relationship. I hey just don't seem to know what I hey want.
Remember to focus on involvement or lack thereof between you. If either person is disengaged in any way, it's time to address real issue of; "Is this right relationship for us?"
Exploring your ability to make a lasting commitment should be a first step in your plan for building a healthy and lasting relationship.
Toni Coleman is a relationship coach in McLean,Virginia. She specializes in working with singles that want to create lasting, intimate relationships. She has also written numerous email classes for singles on all aspects of meeting, dating and relating. She is the author of the email newsletter, The Art of Intimacy, which goes out to thousands of subscribers monthly
