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The third type of ambush is apparent when we find ourselves, usually under stress, behaving just like someone important from our distant past. It happens because our personalities are formed from borrowed parts, attitudes and values called introjects, taken from influential people with whom we came into contact during our preschool years. Unfortunately, although we can counteract undesirable introjects as adults, we don’t have a choice as children. For example, it may be
harsh, critical aspects of a powerful but emotionally distant father that we internalize and later act out, rather than
kinder, more accepting aspects of our mother.
How you sever these toxic ties with our past is a two step process. This article has hopefully helped you to take
first step, recognizing these historical influences in your life. The second step involves tempering these influences by integrating childhood memories with adult skills and experiences. More about this in
next issue. In
meantime, if you are keen to get started, call my assistant Nancy at 881-1206 to schedule a free consultation.

Dr. Cook is a registered clinical psychologist and founder of Aegis Psychological Services Inc.. His speciality is helping people with stress and anxiety-related conditions, including job-related and post-traumatic stress.