For example, if you are driving your child to school and a driver cuts you off, verbalize link between your thoughts and feelings by saying something like “I wonder why I’m feeling so angry; I guess I was saying to myself: ‘Now I’m going to be late because guy in front of me is going so darn slow. If he is going to drive like that he shouldn’t drive during rush hour. How rude.’”

Step 3: Create a game called ‘thought catching.’ This helps your child learn to identify thoughts that flit across his or her mind at times they feel worst. These thoughts, although barely noticeable, greatly affect mood and behavior.

For instance, if your child received a poor grade, ask: “When you got your grade, what did you say to yourself?”

Step 4: Teach your child how to evaluate automatic thoughts. This means acknowledging that they things you say to yourself are not necessarily accurate.

For instance, after receiving poor grade your child may be telling himself he is a failure, he is not as smart as other kids; he will never be able to succeed in school, etc. Many of these self-statements may not be accurate, but they are ‘automatic’ in that situation.

Step 5: Instruct your child on how to generate more accurate explanations (to themselves) when bad things happen and use them to challenge your child’s automatic but inaccurate thoughts. Part of this process involves looking for evidence to contrary (good grades in past, success in other life areas, etc).

Another skill to teach your child to help him or her think optimistically is to ‘decatastrophize’ situation – that is – help your child see that bad event may not be as bad or will not have adverse consequences imagined. Few things in life are as devastating as we fear, yet we blow them up in our minds.

Parents can influence thinking styles of their children by modeling principals of optimistic thinking.

Personally, I have been victim of burglars three times. They took electronic equipment from my home and all my tools from garage. If I had known then about such devices as personal alarms, wireless alarms and driveway alarms, none of losses would have occurred.

My daughter has been a victim of spousal abuse. Her three-year-old daughter (the sunshine in my life) witnessed much of this. When I see how some people have little or no respect for rights and property of others, I worry for her as she gets older. My daughter carries pepper spray on her keychain; I bought it for her.

You have experiences similar to mine and can relate to my concerns. Perhaps it’s your father or mother, your grandparents, other loved ones. They need to be aware of self protection products for their safety and well-being. Yes we tell them what to look for and what to do if they are involved in a dangerous situation, but we don’t inform them of products available to use in such predicaments.

Granted, it might not be wise for them to use all self-defense products, but they should know that stun guns, stun alarm flashlights, cell phone stun guns, pepper pagers, pepper spray, personal alarms, home protection devices, and new stunning ring are available for their use.

So, how do we remedy this situation? If you have grandparents or even parents who are seniors, tell them about these products. The electronic and print media could produce special segments on use of such products. Those of us with web sites can target this group of people. Law enforcement officials often have seminars informing seniors how to protect their homes and themselves. Sessions could be scheduled demonstrating self-defense products and use of them.

With more attention and focus on senior citizens, this oversight could be corrected. They have as much right to protect themselves as anyone else.

For information on home security and self-defense products, visit www.safetyenforcer.com.