6. Don't VOLUNTEER.

They don't trust you yet. "Get" that. Don't volunteer to make coffee or make nightly run to FedEx. You could poison them. You might never make it to FedEx office. (I am not kidding.)

7. Don't MAKE IT TOO HARD, OR TOO EASY.

Pace your initial tasks. If you start out blazing, you'll be held to that pace forever, or you may threaten others who do what you do. If you go too slow, you might not be there long. It's a marathon, not a sprint.

8. Don't SAY 'NO'.

If you're asked to join them for lunch, pitch in for a baby shower gift, "grab phone," or do a task for someone, say "yes." If something goes against grain (and there's always one person in an office who tries to make life hell for new guy it seems), file it for later. First you need to find out how disputes are handled.

The good manager, one with high EQ who knows people, and knows HER people, will tell you, "If so-and-so gives you any trouble, just be nice. Then come tell me and I'll take care of it." The inept manager won't know, or isn't willing to deal with it, and you'll have to figure it out for yourself. How do you do this? By having your antennae out. Observe and process.

EXCEPTION: Occasionally in an office you're ignored for first few weeks, except by loser, who will ask you to join him or her for lunch, trying to build an alliance. In that case, you come up with an excuse ("Sorry, gotta run to bank at noon.")

9. Don't CRITIQUE, CRITICIZE, or APPEAR TO BE COMPLAINING.

You'll notice things that could be done differently and better, but if you speak at this point it will sound like complaining or criticizing. If it's too hot or too cold, for instance, wait it out. The "new kid on block" isn't entitled to anything. You can straighten place out later.

10. Don't VIOLATE PACK BEHAVIOR.

You watch Discovery Channel, don’t you? Well, picture troop of monkeys, i.e., if you’re not alpha male, you’re just one of pack, so start grinning and grooming others.

11. Don’t UNDERESTIMATE THE EFFECT OF INITIAL CONDITIONS.

In physics it’s called “sensitive initial conditions.” It means way “it” (any system) begins makes a huge and permanent difference. Think of what you say and do as being broadcast with a loudspeaker into a cavern which will reverberate and echo for months. There’s not such thing as an “innocent comment” when you’re new, and if you show up in a bright print dress when everyone else is in neutral and pants, you’ll reinvent term “sticking out like a sore thumb.” The onus (hard work) is on you. They will be ADJUSTING to you. You must ADAPT to them (a far stronger concept). When in doubt, get coaching! You want to get off to a good start.

I mean, how can you learn without messing up every once in a while? You need to make a mistake to learn. If you did everything perfectly, then you’ll never know right strategy from wrong.

Are You a Leader?

Then there’s a whole other set of people who admit to their mistakes, acknowledge that they stumbled, but they go right into contingency mode. I mean, so you screwed up, so what? It’s not end of world is it? The Earth will still be in orbit and mosquitoes will still be biting hell out of your legs. It’s not a question of: “I screwed up, give me pity”, it’s a question of: “Okay, I slipped-up, but this is what I’m going to do about it...”

The best leaders out there are ones who made most mistakes but learned from them. The ones that never discovered or acknowledged their faux pas never made it into business world and never made a difference in their own life, or world.

Young Toronto Blue Jays starting pitcher Josh Towers went 0-12 last season between Baltimore and its Triple-A club. Last year as Jays' fifth starter he went 8-1. Quite turn around from just a year ago! Josh Towers, winning Jays' pitcher in last game of season, said:

"You can't succeed without failing. I failed. I learned a lot from that."

Now go out there and pitch a perfect game in your life. You might fail once. Or twice. Or ten times. But just remember, each failure brings you closer to a glowing success.