10 Things to Know About Silence in Communication

Written by Susan Dunn, MA Psychology, Emotional Intelligence Coach


One ofrepparttar most important parts of any conversation isrepparttar 130670 silence. Silence can serve many functions in a conversation and how you manage it determines your level of sophistication.

Here are some points to keep in mind about silence in communication.

1. Allowing silence in a conversation puts pressure onrepparttar 130671 other person.

It’s conventional inrepparttar 130672 US not to allow any sort of extended silence in a conversation. Therefore, to allow one puts pressure onrepparttar 130673 other person to "fill air time". Some interviewers, for instance, use this technique to see what will happen. Oftenrepparttar 130674 person will “spill” – saying exactlyrepparttar 130675 thing they didn’t want to say.

2. Silence can indicate hostility.

Withdrawing, “stonewalling,” and pouting in silence are ways some people handle anger. Such a silence can be pulsating with bad feelings and elicit anger onrepparttar 130676 part ofrepparttar 130677 other person.

3. Silence can indicate disagreement.

While it’s almost never an indication of indifference, silence can indicate thatrepparttar 130678 other person is having negative emotions. When we experience anger, fear, or embarrassment, our thinking brain shuts down. We sit there fuming, unable to speak; enraged and unable to find words; afraid and scared speechless. Some people are “flooded” with these emotions, and unable to respond.

4. Silence can indicate profoundness, such as awe or horror.

Sometimes when we’re listening to someone else, we hear something that leaves us speechless because it really goes beyond words. Listening to someone talk about a dreadful trauma they’ve endured, or a beautiful, almost-sacred interaction with another human being, or a description of an awesome natural event such as a sunset or a volcano eruption are examples. Somehow when we listen to such things,repparttar 130679 ordinary “Oh” and “Wow” and “That’s awesome” don’t seem enough, and so we fall silent.

5. Silence can indicate respect.

In some cultures more than others, silence indicates respect. A young person may be expected to approach an older person or a person in authority and remain silent until recognized, acknowledged and spoken to.

Second Time Around the Block

Written by Skye Thomas


Second Time Around The Block

Divorce happens. I'm not going to debaterepparttar causes orrepparttar 130668 moral and ethical implications of that here. Even if you'rerepparttar 130669 innocent one who stuck to your vows and got dumped anyway, you still have to pick yourself up and move on. So let's start from that place. At some point you will wrestle within yourself and within your spiritual and religious beliefs as to whether or not you will date again. This article is for those of you who have decided that yes, you are going to date again and maybe even get married again. You've decided to give love a second chance.

In order to improve your odds at succeeding, you need to consider your timing. If your goal is to find true love and to have a wonderful long-term relationship with someone, then for your new partner's sake you must have worked through your issues overrepparttar 130670 last one. You may be dying inside, feeling incredibly vulnerable, alone, and needy. That'srepparttar 130671 time when it's easiest to reach out clutching atrepparttar 130672 first person who comes along that looks like they might be a decent fit into your world. Those rebound relationships seldom work out. Even if through your pain and misery you did manage to pickrepparttar 130673 ideal mate for yourself, you are still going to have emotions around your old partner. The new partner has to endure watching you ache and hurt for a marriage that's over. If you truly loved your spouse, even if you'rerepparttar 130674 one who asked forrepparttar 130675 divorce, then you're going to have feelings of remorse and a need to mourn what is dead and gone. Ideally, you wouldn't have married them inrepparttar 130676 first place if you didn't truly love them and you have to on some level have expected 'happily ever after.' Even if you stayed too long and had time to process throughrepparttar 130677 emotions of wanting to leave, you still have a good chance of feeling like you've failed at something so incredibly important. It can be excruciating to fall madly in love with someone and have to postponerepparttar 130678 'honeymoon' stage ofrepparttar 130679 relationship because your new love is processing through all of this stuff and really isn't able to completely submerge themselves intorepparttar 130680 beauty of falling in love with you.

If you can't wait until after you've really healed from all of those little triggers and such that keep going off in your head and heart, then at least be honest with your new partner and let them know where you really are inrepparttar 130681 process. You owe them that much. Give your new partnerrepparttar 130682 truth as to where you are mentally so they can make an informed decision about whether or not they want to enter into a full time one on one relationship with you at this moment in time. You don't have to be completely alone though either. Perhaps you could continue dating lightly as friends and they can be a wonderful source of inspiration and a great ego booster during your recovery. Then downrepparttar 130683 road when you've gotten yourself in a place where you can really open your eyes and your heart to completely focus on creating a new relationship, then you can make a commitment. I thinkrepparttar 130684 key here is being really clear with yourself as to where you are inrepparttar 130685 whole thing and also trusting your new partner enough to tell themrepparttar 130686 truth.

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